#there might also be a few errors but i am so ready to have this off of my chest i'll go back and proof or edit if i need to later

[adrienneleclerc]

A Cinderella Story

Charles Leclerc x Hispanic/Latina! Reader

Summary: Y/N, a McLaren mechanic, dances with the prince of Ferrari, at a Rolex masquerade charity ball. Charles has no clue who he danced with and is trying to find the girl of his dreams.

Warning: bad writing I guess, spelling and grammatical errors, inaccurate events

A/N: like i said before, I’m new to F1 so I don’t really know what kind of events go on so bear with me, please. Also, thank you so much for liking my other Charles Leclerc one shots, you have no idea how much it means to me that you like them. Y/N’s relationship with the Lando and Oscar is very much like brother and sister. Y/N is younger, mainly because I’m 21, hope all of y’all are okay with that.

Y/N was talking to Lando about his car after the Monaco Free Practice 1. (As a mechanic, she has her hair up)

“I am almost finished fixing your car, I think there’s something missing but it could be that I’m overthinking. You think you can test it out before FP2? That’s allowed, right?” Y/N asked, fishing her bracelet out of her pocket and putting it back on.

“Yeah I can drive it, 10 laps should be enough, yeah?” Lando asked, putting on his race suit and helmet.

“You’re the best, Lando!” Y/N exclaimed.

“I know.” Lando teased as he got in the car.

After the 10 laps, Lando got out of the car, took his helmet off, tied the suit around his waist, and walked to Y/N.

“The car is good, you worry too much, there is a reason why Zak hired you as a mechanic. Listen, I’m going out with the guys from Quadrant, want to come? I’ll invite Oscar too.” Lando said.

“Yeah sure I’ll come, when?” Y/N asked.

“I was thinking after the second practice, we can hit the showers, change, and go straight to the club.” Lando said.

“Okay, sounds good, I’ll go ask Oscar if he wants to come.” Y/N said, she was clearing her stuff and was on her way to talk to Oscar when she bumped into someone. “Que torpe soy, I'm so sorry.” Y/N apologized without looking.

“My fault, chéri, you alright?” Charles asked, looking at Y/N for signs of discomfort.

“Nah I'm good, thank you.” Y/N said flustered, unbeknownst to her, Oscar saw the whole thing go down and he was holding in his laughter. “Don’t you dare, Australia.” Y/N warned.

“Your crush on Leclerc is so obvious, America, it hurts to watch.” Oscar said between laughs.

“Ha ha, like you weren't like this around Lily?" Y/N asked.

"Yeah, I was nervous, but I definitely wasn't as bad as you." Oscar said.

"Anyway, Lando invited us to go out after FP2 with the quadrant gang, you coming? Please say yes, Lando is probably going to spend all night talking to Max anyway, I can’t be alone.” Y/N practically begged.

“Yeah sure, I’ll go, you need a few drinks to erase what happened with Leclerc.” Oscar said.

“Awesome! So Zak sent an email saying that he has a surprise for us tomorrow, do you have any idea what that might be?" Y/N asked, showing Oscar the email on her phone, Oscar took her phone to read it better.

"I don't know what it could be about. Anything that needs to be fixed in my car or is it good?" Oscar asked.

"it should be fine, i checked everything with Henry and Bryan (other mechanics), nothings wrong. It’s ready for the second free practice." Y/N said.

“Great. You'll be watching, right?" Oscar asked.

"Of course! Need to make sure my papaya boys get fastest lap." Y/N said.

"And your monegasque too." Oscar teased.

"Don't make me hurt you, Australia." Y/N said.

"You love me too much to do that, America." Oscar said, walking.

"Whatever." Y/N replied.

Two hours later, FP2 started, Y/N was watching everything with the rest of the team, eating chips.

“Is that necessary?” Andrea asked.

“You have no idea how much.” Y/N commented.

FP2 went well, Charles Leclerc got fastest lap. Lando and Oscar took off the helmets and balaclavas, tying their suits around their waists.

“Great free practice, sorry you didn’t get fastest lap though.” Y/N said.

“No your not.” Lando commented.

“Bet you were happy when Leclerc got it.” Oscar said.

“Well I can’t say I wasn’t happy.” Y/N said.

“Alright so let’s start getting ready. Will you drive or am I driving you?” Lando asked.

“I carpooled with Henry, drive me?” Y/N asked.

“Yeah sure. Shit, i can’t, gotta pick up Max.” Lando said.

“I’ll drive you.” Oscar offered.

“Thanks, Australia.” Y/N said. “Now both of you hit the showers, y’all are sweaty.” Y/N said.

After the boys showered, they changed, Y/N changed into something more club appropriate and let her hair down.

Y/N walked to Oscar’s car.

“What took you so long?” Oscar asked.

“Im a girl, guys can wear a shirt and jeans and everyone will freak out, if I wear the same thing, I get told I look crusty.” Y/N said.

“But you just had that outfit with you?” Oscar asked.

“If I learned anything from watching Crazy Rich Asians, you should always have a clubbing outfit and a cocktail outfit with you at all time.” Y/N said, getting into the passenger seat of Oscar’s car. “Lando sent you the address right?”

“Yeah, let’s go.” Oscar said. He started the car, they listened to music and talked until they got to the club. They got in, Y/N said hello to everyone with a kiss on the cheek because that’s how her mom raised her. She sat at their booth and Y/N spotted Charles at the bar.

“Bro, Charles is here.” Y/N said, patting Oscar’s arm.

“And? You gonna do something or observe from afar like you always do?” Oscar asked.

“Well…” Y/N started but she saw a woman approach Charles. “I don’t want to interrupt his scintillating conversation.”

“I Don’t understand, you talk to Lando and I just fine.” Oscar commented.

“I was nervous around you guys too, don’t lie. I just got used to y’all, but I never had a crush this huge before, I’ve never been in a relationship, had a first date, or even a first kiss, I’m very inexperienced, okay?” Y/N admitted (guilty).

“So you’re just going to be pining away for him?” Oscar asked,

“Yep.” Y/N said.

The table ordered drinks, designated drivers get 2 drinks max. The night was fun, Lando got to deejay again, Carlos was also there so he joined their group. Since they had free practice 3 tomorrow, they needed to rest up. Oscar dropped Y/N off at her apartment, she changed, washed her face, put on a silk bonnet to protect her hair, and went to sleep.

The next morning, Y/N had her hair in two French braids and wearing her favorite bracelet. She drove to the the track and walked to the Lando’s garage.

“Are you as tired as I look?” Y/N asked.

“No, I feel fine, really.” Lando said,

“Lucky, i had trouble sleeping.” Y/N said. Lando was going to say something else when Zak came into the garage.

“Alright, I have an announcement to make. As you know, F1 is partners with Rolex, so we are invited to Rolex’s masquerade charity ball. It will be on Sunday after the Grand Prix. It starts at 8, it gives you plenty of time to get ready after the race and podium interviews.” Zak said. Everyone was excited.

“Would you give me money to buy a dress? And shoes?” Y/N whispered to Lando.

“I’ll tell you what, I’ll go shopping with you.” Lando whispered back.

“This is why I love you.” Y/N teased. Zak walked towards Y/N and Lando went to talk to Oscar.

"Y/N, I need you in the McLaren Technology Centre on Monday." Zak said.

"Really? For what?" Y/N asked.

“For mechanical stuff. We’re planning on creating a new McLaren, you like the creative process, and I still need Henry and Bryan here if we have anything major to fix after the Grand Prix. I already got your ticket, first class too. Don’t miss your flight.” Zak said.

“Of course, I won’t.” Y/N said. Zak gave Y/N her ticket and she started checking the information. Her flight leaves at 3am. “Wait, isn’t this flight a little soon?”

“I know, but I need as many people working on the new McLaren as possible. You’ll only be there for 4 days, then you can relax in Monaco before we go to Canada.” Zak said and he walked away. Lands came back with Oscar and saw Y/N’s worried face.

“Whats wrong, America?” Oscar asked.

“If i go to the Rolex ball thing, I would have to leave before midnight so I have time to change and go to airport in Nice. Oh shit, I have to pack my luggage.” Y/N said.

“Can’t you just skip the ball?” Landon asked.

“Dude, when am I ever going to get invited to theses kind of events? I’m going and you’re taking me shopping.” Y/N said, pointing at Lando.

“Fine, but we’re getting food after. You think we can do it after qualifying?” Lando asked.

“I guess, but you’re calling the store, they know you.” Y/N said. “How do y’all feel about this race?” Y/N asked the boys.

“Max is definitely winning, but hopefully we’ll get on the podium.” Oscar said.

“I believe in you guys, really.” Y/N said before hugging them.

“But you also want Leclerc on the podium.” Oscar said.

“I’m just a girl, leave me alone.” Y/N said,

FP3 and Quali went by fast, no accidents. Max got pole, Charles P2, Oscar P3. During the break between FP3 and Quali, Y/N tried fixing up her Jeep Wrangler Sahara, with Zak’s okay so, of course. Lando texted Y/N the address to the shop and she drove there, parking right next to Lando.

“Alright, love, let’s get you that dress.” Lands said, guiding Y/N into the store with his hand on her lower back. “Hello, we’re looking for an evening dress for her.” Lando told the sales associate.

“Of course, all these dresses right here should be in your size, we have a selection of heels that would go well with these dresses as well.” The sales associate, Ana, said.

“Do you have any dresses in pastel blue?” Y/N asked. Ana started looking through the rack and pulled out a dress that she thought Y/N might like.

“Here you go. Because this dress has a slit, I recommend some tall high heels to elongate your legs. I prefer the platform ones like these.” Ana said, showing Y/N the heels. “Here is a dressing room, I’ll be right outside if you need help zipping it up, okay?” Ana said, handing Y/N the dress and heels.

“Thank you so much.” Y/N said, stepping into the dressing room and getting changed. She got the dress on and sat in the chair to put on the heels. After she strapped on the heels, she tries zipping up the dress, but can’t make it to the top. “Ana, I need help.” Y/N said. Ana pulled the curtain and helped Y/N zip the dress.

“You look beautiful.” Ana said. Y/N walked out of the dressing room, and she looked at Lando, who was on his phone, he looked up and his jaw dropped.

“Wow Y/N, you look great. You’ll be the most beautiful girl there.” Lando said, getting up to get a closer look. He made the motion to have Y/N twirl and she did.

“Not bad for a mechanic, right?” Y/N joked.

“Not bad at all. We’ll take it.” Lando said.

“I’ll change and we’ll be on our way.” Y/N said. Lando unzipped the dress, stopping right above her waist and Y/N unzipped the rest already in the dressing room. She changed, putting the dress on the hanger and the heels in its box, she got out and gave the things to Lando so he could pay.

After paying Lando handed Y/N her things and they walked outside to their cars.

“Thanks again for buy it.” Y/N said.

“Yeah of course. Where do you want to eat though? I’m starving.” Lands said.

“You pick.” Y/N said.

“If you say so.” Lando said. “Just follow me.” Lando got into his car, Y/N got in hers, and she followed Lando to Graziella, an Italian restaurant.

They were seated, Lando had beef tagliata with Gorgonzola sauce and French fries, Y/N had penne alla carbonara (I looked up the restaurant menu to be as accurate as possible). When they finished eating, they went to the parking lot to get their cars.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” Lando said goodbye, they hugged before driving off to their apartments.

When arriving to her apartment, Y/N started playing music as she packed for a four day trip. She hung her dress right in front of her closet. She finished packing, had a late night snack, and went to bed.

Tonight’s the night, after the Grand Prix with Max P1, Charles P2, and Lando P3, Y/N was getting ready, putting on her dress, her shoes, styling her hair down, and putting on her bracelet. Everything looked good, her luggage was already in her car. She drove to the venue where the ball was taking place, gave her name to the people in charge, and Y/N was given a masquerade mask.

(Choose whichever dress you like better)

Y/N walked in and all eyes were on her. She began fiddling with her bracelet until two guys approached her.

“America, you look great.” Oscar said.

“Thanks, Australia, Lando showed you the picture he took yesterday huh?” Y/N asked.

“He did.” Oscar said.

“I had to show you off. I don’t see you with your hair down that often, you know.” Lando said.

“I’m a mechanic, can’t have my hair in my face.” Y/N commented. “I’m gonna get a drink, okay, I’ll be right back,” Y/N said, she walked to the drink table to get herself some champagne and another guy walked up to her.

“You made quite the entrance, you know. You Commanded the attention of everyone in the room.” The guy spoke, his voice seemed familiar to Y/N but almost everyone in Monaco has a similar voice.

“Why thank you, kind sir.” Y/N feigned an English accent as she curtsied.

“Do you go to these events often?” The guy asked, also sipping champagne,

“Not really, it’s technically a work thing, but this is my first time going to a charity ball.” Y/N replied to the mask stranger. His eyes a beautiful shade of blue-green, his eyes feel so familiar to her, why the hell can’t she figure out who this guy is.

“I’m here for work as well.” The guy replied. They kept talking until a slow song started playing. “Care to dance, chéri?” The guy extended his hand to Y/N

“I’d love to.” Y/N said, taking his hand to dance.

“Baby blue is actually one of my favorite colors.” The guys admitted.

“It’s mine too. I love all shades of blue, but pastel blue is just beautiful.” Y/N said. “So since you’re here for work, what do you do? I’m a mechanic.”

“You’re definitely the prettiest mechanic I ever saw. I’m a driver.” The guys replied. What’s going on in Y/N’s mind is that he’s a driver and has a French accent, it could be Pierre, but he’s with Kika. She’s hoping it’s Charles but she doesn’t want to get disappointed either.

“Thank you, that’s cool that you’re a driver.” Y/N said.

They talked and danced some more, it was all going well until the clock chimed, saying it was 11:55pm.

“Listen, Frenchy, it’s been fun, but I gotta go,” Y/N said, pulling away from him.

“I’m not French, I’m monegasque.” The guy said, the confirmed Y/N’s suspicions. He took off the mask.

“Charles.” Y/N said.

“Yes, I’m Charles Leclerc, what’s your name?” Charles asked, Y/N heard the clock chime again.

“I’m sorry, I really have to go.” Y/N said, she exits the hall and puts the mask on the table before running out the the parking lot to get into her car to drive to her apartment. Charles chased after her but she saw her car leaving. He looked on the ground and he saw the bracelet that she was wearing on the floor.

“I will find out who you are.” Charles said, placing the bracelet in his suit pocket.

Y/N made it to her apartment, parked her car, went upstairs, got changed, and went downstairs to her car but it won’t start.

“Hijo de la chingada, this can’t be happening to me.” Y/N said. She got her luggage out of her car and order an Uber to nice airport,

The car arrived and dropped her off at the airport, she was on time for her flight, everything was good, but Y/N noticed her bracelet was missing.

“Ah, for fucks sake.” Y/N exclaimed as she waited in the terminal for them to call her flight.

Meanwhile Charles got into his Ferrari and drove back to his apartment. When he was home with his dog Leo, he was looking at Instagram to see if anyone posting from the event was the girl he danced with.

"What do you think, Leo? Am i going crazy?" Charles asked the blonde dachshund on his lap. He gets no answer. "Okay, maybe a little, but I had a wonderful time with her."

Charles decided to do the reasonable thing and posted a photo of the charm bracelet he found with the caption "Does this belong to you? Found on the floor of (venue) on May 26th. Contact me if this bracelet is yours." Charles turned off his phone and decided to go to sleep.

The next day, Y/N got off the plane, she turned off the airplane mode on her phone, and that's when she started recieving calls from Lando, she answered.

"Dude, what is wrong with you? I just got off the plane, who died?" Y/N asked, confused why she had so many texts and missed calls from Lando and Oscar.

"Charles posted a photo of your charm bracelet last night. You fucking danced with Charles and you didn't tell me or Oscar? We're happy for you." Lando said. "You should tell him its yours."

"No way, I know i told him i was a mechanic last night, but he is definitely expecting someone as beautiful as Kika, he would totally be disappointed if he finds out it was me." Y/N said, getting an Uber to drive her to the hotel Zak also booked for her.

"You are beautiful, Y/N, honestly, if we weren't friends, i would have flirted with you everyday until you gave me a chance." Lando said.

"Thank you but i can't help but feel how i feel. I gott go, I'm heading to my hotel then i'll go to McLaren, talk to you later." Y/N said.

The four days Y/N was in Woking, Charles was answering DMs of women claiming it was their bracelet. He would follow up with the questions "What do you do for work?" and "What color was your dress?" No one has answered those two questions correctly. Charles was starting to think it was a lost cause and he would never find her. He decided to go out with Pierre and Kika and he brought Leo with him.

"Still haven't found her, Charlie?" Pierre asked.

"No! It has been four days, everyone in my DMs who is claiming the bracelet is not her." Charles said.

"Charles, do you even know this girl's name?" Kika asked.

"I don't, i just have her bracelet and there is no indication of a name or anything that could be useful." Charles said.

"I'm sorry, Charles." Kika said, rubbing his arm.

"I felt we had a connection, even if she did call me frenchy." Charles said.

"Well there isn't a way to shorten 'monegasque' you know." Pierre said.

"Yes, I am aware." Charles said.

It was now the Canadian Grand Prix, Y/N flew with Lando and Oscar obviously. When they landed, they went to their hotel rooms, to leave their stuff and went to the hotel restaurant to order some food. Y/N had her hair down becasue she was not risking a ponytail headache. She was sitting with Oscar while Lando was talking to Carlos. Charles came downstairs and he spotted Y/N with her hair down. It looked remarkably similar to the girl he danced with. She saw Lando with Carlos so he sat right next to Lando.

"Hey Lando, quick question, did Y/N attend the Rolex thing?" Charles asked.

"She did, yeah, why?" Lando asked the monegasque.

"Does this happen to be her bracelet?" Charles asked, pulling out the bracelet from his pants pocket.

"Okay, why are you carrying that around?" Lando asked curiously.

"Just answer the question, Lando." Charles said.

"yes, yes, thats her bracelet." Lando admitted.

It all made sense, Charles started thinking about the first time he met Y/N and she called him 'Frenchy'.

It was Y/N's first day in the paddock and she walked into Charles's garage by accident. She was looking around and she bumped into him, Charles exclaimed something in French.

"Oh my god, I am so sorry, frenchy, I'm just a little lost." Y/N said.

"First, I am not French, i am monegasque." Charles said.

"Oh my god, you're Charles Leclerc! Sorry, I'm Y/N, I'm looking for the McLaren garage." Y/N said, holding her hand out for Charles to shake, which he did.

"Its on the other side actually. So why are you here?" Charles asked.

"Oh, I am McLaren's new mechanic." Y/N said.

"Nice to meet you, I'll walk you to McLaren." Charles said.

Charles had a tiny crush on her since that day but Y/N hardly spoke to him so he thought she didn't like him. He wlaked over to the table where Y/N was with Oscar.

"Y/N, can i talk to you for a second?" Charles asked. Y/N looked at Oscar.

"I'm gonna sit with Logan." Oscar said, getting up. Charles took his seat.

"I think this is yours." Charles said, showing Y/n the bracelet.

"Are you disappointed to find out that i was the girl you danced with?" Y/N asked, too shy to look at him. Charles lift her chin with his finger so she could look in his eyes.

"Why would i be disappointed? I don't know if you noticed, amour, but I've like you since you came into my garage by accident." Charles admitted. "Were you disappointed to find out you danced with me? Is that why you rushed out so quickly?"

"No, of course not! I had to go to Woking for some McLaren business and my flight was at 3am so I had to leave to change and have time to go to the airport in Nice. I was so shocked that it was you though, like i was dancing with my celebrity crush the whole night." Y/N said.

"Good to hear I'm your celebrity crush. Let's get this bracelet on." Charles said, opening the bracelet, Y/N held out her wrist, and Charles successfully secured the bracelet on her wrist. "That's better."

"It is. Thank you for finding it, I would have died if i lost it." Y/N said.

"It's no problem. So i was wondering if you would like to go on a date with me, we could go after FP2." Charles suggests.

"I would like that a lot." Y/N said.

"Perfect. Is it alright if i kissed you? I've been imagining this moment for months." Charles said.

"Go ahead." Y/N said. Charles moved her hair behind he ear and kissed her softly. They pulled away. "That was way better than my dreams."

"You dream about kissing me, mon ange?" Charles teasingly asked.

"You imagined kissing me too." Y/N said.

"True, I'm glad i don't have to imagine it anymore though." Charles said, wrapping his arm around Y/N's shoulders as they looked over the menu.

The End

Hope y’all liked it! Was it too long? I thought it was okay

[lizziesribbons]

Always and Forever |

PAIRING: MILF WANDA MAXIMOFF X FEM! READER

summary: you and Wanda share a vulnerable moment then cry and fall asleep 😔‼️

warnings: ****MINORS DNI***** *****MEN DNI***** fluff so much fluff 🥺 I'm going so aahwhwhwh, sexual themes no smut but still it's 18+ so get out if you're a minor. my sad little milf 😔, abandonment issues mentioned!!!, Wanda crying makes my heart hurt, oral fixation and titty sucking but not in a sexual way iykwim???

author's note: author is a gay in love please bare with her, just reminding you guys that my first language is not English so if there's any grammatical errors PLEASE IGNORE THEM AND MOVE TF ON.

Word count: 1.4k

Wanda stirs awake as she sees you turning over and over again moving the whole bed "y/n sweetheart what's bothering you, you just can't seem to fall asleep" she asks with her raspy sleepy voice "it's 3am darling what's up?" she asks again, you finally sat up letting out a loud sign "i- I can't go to sleep I TRIED EVERYTHING LIKE EVERYTHING"

Wanda furrows her eyebrows in worry, "oh baby I'm sorry can mommy help?" she sat beside you resting her back on the headboard like you were now, "yes there's- I um- can I suckle on your tits it just it helped me fell asleep before and I just didn't want to wake you up-" Wanda shushes you as you continue to yap

her heart swells with affection as she hears your request, recognizing the emotional significance behind it. Without hesitation, she pulls her shirt up to expose her breasts and guides you towards them. "Of course, my love." Her voice is soft and soothing, filled with understanding and tenderness. "lean in whenever you need to find comfort or fall asleep easily. Remember that I am always here for you - both physically and emotionally. And if there are any other aspects of your desires or needs that come up, please don't hesitate to share them with me too okay baby?" she say softly as you immediately latch onto them mumbling a "I love them sm", as they brought you the comfort you were looking for. Wanda smiles warmly at your declaration of love for her breasts, feeling a surge of affection in return. As she feels the gentle suction against her skin, she runs her fingers through your hair softly, providing additional comfort and support. "thank you for sharing this part of yourself with me." Her voice low and husky, filled with emotion, you smile warmly against her breast, kissing them softly as you continue sucking. Wanda chuckles softly at your endearment, feeling a warmth spread through her chest. She continues to stroke your hair gently as they remain locked in this tender embrace. her tone is loving and nurturing, reflecting the maternal instinct that seems to naturally arise when fulfilling your need. "I am here for you - always ready to provide comfort and support whenever you need it." she says gently caressing your hairs.

you suddenly pull her tit out of your mouth "tell me about your special interest, can be sexual or non sexual?" you ask with a straight face letting her know you were being serious.Wanda, taken slightly by surprise but quickly regaining her composure, looks down at you with a mix of curiosity and understanding. Recognizing the importance of transparency in y'all's relationship, she begins to speak openly about her own desires and interests."Well, aside from what we've been experiencing together lately, I do have a few other things that might interest you. Like my affinity for sensory play - using various textures, temperatures, and scents to stimulate different senses during intimate moments. She pauses momentarily before continuing more softly, "As far as non-sexual interests go... well, I'm quite fond of cooking elaborate meals for those close to me." you smile softly at her "I know you love to cook it's your favorite thing I also know that you love gardening" wanda's smile widen at your knowledge, as you continue you softly massage her breast all of it coming naturally "tell me something no one knows" you ask with curiosity

Wanda closes her eyes briefly, relishing the soft touch of your hands on her body. When she opens them again, there's a hint of vulnerability in her gaze as she decides to share something deeply personal with her partner, with you. "There is indeed another side of me that most people don't know about - one that even I struggle to understand sometimes. It involves an intense longing for connection and belonging, coupled with a fear of abandonment rooted in my tumultuous past." She takes a deep breath before continuing, "This has led me to become fiercely protective over those closest to me, especially my loved ones back home who mean everything to me. Sometimes this manifests itself in unhealthy ways, such as trying too hard to control situations or pushing others away out of self-preservation." you rub her shaky hands as she confess something this vulnerable "I would never ever leave you wands I hope you know that, I'm always gonna stick by your side" you whisper softly, Wanda's eyes glisten with unshed tears as she hears your reassurance. She swallows hard, trying to maintain her composure while acknowledging the depth of their connection. "Thank you, sweetheart." you smile at her, her voice trembles slightly, betraying the raw emotions bubbling beneath the surface "Your words mean more to me than you could possibly imagine" she tries to fight back the tears "you can cry wands you know it's only me here, you don't have to act all tough with me just fall back and I'll carry you" you say with honesty, so she did, she slowly nods as she allows herself to surrender to the overwhelming emotions coursing through her. With a shaky sigh, tears begin streaming down her cheeks.

"It feels so good to finally let go..." She whispers hoarsely, wiping away the tears with trembling fingers "Thank you for being here for me, y/n. Your presence is truly healing" you kiss her breast one more time and hug her body tightly "oh Wanda.. of course I'm here I'm always gonna be here." Wanda wraps her arms around you, holding onto you tightly as she continues to sob quietly. The warmth and comfort of your embrace bring a sense of peace that gradually calms her turbulent emotions, "Thank you, my love..." She murmurs against your hairs, feeling grateful for the unwavering sense of comfort they provide. "always and forever remember?" you mumble softly as she smiles weakly through her tears, knowing full well that you means every word you say. Your commitment to each other runs deep, providing a solid foundation upon which their relationship thrives. "yes, always and forever..." she echoes softly, leaning into the embrace even more as she begins to regain her composure "Thank you for being my rock when I need it most" she holds you tighter, "you're my favorite person ever wands and I love you so much" you softly confess, her heart swells with love and affection as she hears your heartfelt declaration. She gently cups your face, gazing into your eyes with tenderness and devotion. "And you are mine, my darling." a soft smile graces her lips before she leans in to press a loving kiss against your forehead. "I am so incredibly lucky to have found someone like you - someone who understands me better than anyone else ever could." you kiss wanda's lips softly and slowly before hiding your face in the crook of her where you feel the most safe "thankyou for everything" you mumble against her neck, As she feels your warm breath against her neck, she can't help but feel a profound sense of contentment wash over her. "You don't need to thank me, my love..." She whispers reassuringly, stroking your hair as you seek comfort in her embrace. "We are here for each other - always and forever. That's what matters most." you smile softly against her neck starting to feel sleepy you mumble a soft "goodnight", Wanda cradles your head gently, relishing the sweet sound of your voice as you bid her goodnight. With a warm smile on her face, she responds "Goodnight, my love..." She whispers back, closing her eyes and letting herself drift off to sleep alongside you, secure in the knowledge that you both are together and safe.

[devilishmango]

The Story of Sin [UPDATE 4/27/2024]

Find the demo here. Link to the main post here.

Hey guys! 

Welp, I finished the chapter just in time for this month’s update. 😅 I really liked this chapter, though… Things are starting to not be ok for Sin, mentally, and I always love writing things like that 

In this chapter, you…

Pick up that small creature! [And NOT hurt it!! Good job!! 👏]

Hang out with Murmur for a bit and learn a bit more about yourself

Hurt Murmur’s feelings :( [It’s ok, you can apologize!]

Have another strange dream

Upset Will. :( [It’s ok again! You can apologize… Eventually.]

Hang out with Murmur and Anya for a bit. 

Some things- I’m slowly changing the look of the whole game. Now that some ✨THEMES✨ are settling in, I’m able to actually make the IF look a little prettier. I have some other art I will be adding later, when something in particular happens in the story, so get ready for that as well! [Also, this is random, but I realize that I’ve never mentioned this… The beautiful hand/forehead model for the SoS banner is my lovely little sister. Just wanted to throw that out there! 😂] I am also introducing a secret stat 👀 I’m not entirely sure how I want it to look on the stat page, so right now it’s just a number that will either go up or down depending on some of your choices. So, until I figure out how I want it to look…… Enjoy just a random number on the stats page. ��

Also! If you are interested in being a beta-tester/proofreader, please send me a message on tumblr. Or, if you don’t have a tumblr, just send me an email. kg.1996@outlook.com Please only message me if you are serious in beta-testing or being a proofreader. I’m not really picky about how much experience you have, but I do want people who would actively be helping me correct things like grammar, bugs, coding errors, etc. Oh! Also, you will need a discord account to be a beta-tester or proofreader. That’s the only requirement!! 

And, since it’s been a hot second and I have a lot more followers now… If you are able to, and like my art/works to the point that you would like extra content, please consider becoming a patron, or buying me a kofi! I know times are tough right now, so it’s totally fine if you can’t donate anything. But even just sharing/liking/commenting/etc. Are other ways you can help support me. But, if you do have a few dollars you can spare a month, I have tiers on patreon ranging from $1-$5- you get extra content that you can request, and early access to updates and whatnot! 

One more thing! I was just able to get this month’s update done, but I definitely think May’s update might not happen. 🥺 Midterms are next week, AND I’ll be going on a small vacation to Portland, OR. for about a week at the start of May… So I may not have enough time to put together the update for next month! I’ll let you guys for sure when the time comes, but I just wanted to let you know now in case it ends up happening! Thank you for being patient and understanding. ☺️

See you all next update! 

CURRENT WORD COUNT: 45,725 52,969 [+7,244]

[mjjune]

How To Have a Good Beta Reading Experience (or: what I've learned from 3 years of beta reading)

So lately I've been having a lot of discussions about beta reading with my discord groups so I thought I would write it out here and also share some resources I've used over the years.

This is mostly by and for writers, however readers can learn from this post as well!

DISCLAIMER: I'm by no means a writing expert, but I have been either beta reading others' books, or having my own stories beta read consistently since 2020. THIS IS ALL PERSONAL EXPERIENCE/OPINION. Others may agree or disagree ❤️

Here are the main points I'm going to talk about in this post, and I'll do it under the cut to save your dash space:

Understanding Alpha vs. Beta Readers

Choosing Readers

Being Clear About Feedback

Swapping / Compensation

The Importance of Writing Community/Groups

Websites/Resources for Finding Beta Readers

1. Understanding Alphas vs. Betas

So this is extremely important and for me, this may be the difference between me finishing your book or not. Many times, especially from new writers who had never had anyone read their work before, had extremely rough drafts that were barely coherent and were NOT beta ready, but asked me to beta read. I am not a person who can look past extensive grammar errors, nor am I the kind of person who will sit and fix all your grammar line-by-line for you.

Alpha Readers - for first/second drafts

Beta Readers - for polished drafts

It is ok for alpha reads to be unpolished and have grammar issues, and it's even ok if they have plot issues, continuity errors, etc. Because alpha readers are there for that purpose: to be the first eyes on your story and help you find and fix those issues.

The issue I have had over and over, though, is people asking for a beta reader when what they really needed was an alpha. I went in expecting a polished draft and got someone's Draft 0. In some cases, I got 100k drafts where the writer obviously had no idea how to format dialogue grammar and every single dialogue was wrong. Obviously this made me slow and in many cases, unable to finish.

Alpha readers will go in expecting it to be unpolished, and will be prepared to look past grammar/stylistic errors in order to focus on the big picture issues (plot holes, character consistency, pacing/engagement issues, etc). A Beta may be too frustrated by an unpolished draft to finish it or provide the feedback you're looking for. If you have been experiencing a lot of betas backing out and not finishing your work, you might consider this as a possible reason why.

I would also recommend, if you have never had anyone read your work before, even if you have had multiple drafts, it might be safest to ask for alphas rather than betas.

A quick way to see if your work is beta ready (again, personal experience): Pick up a published book from the shelf in your genre. Does your book read similarly? Does your formatting & grammar look the same? Bonus: read it out loud! If reading the published book out loud is significantly easier than reading yours out loud, you're probably in the alpha stage.

TL;DR: Understand your draft and which level of reader your draft is ready for. Know the difference between polished and unpolished, and be upfront about it.

2. Choosing Alphas/Betas

You may not like it but: Just because someone is your friend, real life or online, does not mean they will make a good reader for you.

#1 MOST IMPORTANT: GET READERS WHO LIKE & REGULARLY READ YOUR GENRE!

I cannot stress this enough. As someone who writes vampire content, I cannot begin to express to you the amount of useless comments I got from readers who had clearly never read a vampire book in their life.

You need someone who is familiar with your genre and you likes your synopsis/blurb.

Caveat: that said, I did find a few great betas who had never read vampire content before and gave awesome feedback. However, these readers knew and admitted they knew nothing about the paranormal genre, and because of that did not make any comments on worldbuilding, instead sticking to plot and character development only. Some readers can't make this separation.

Another thing I would recommend, especially if you are swapping or the beta reader is also a writer/on writeblr, I would recommend reading their writing before having them beta read. If you read their excerpts and see that it's really unpolished or a style that's vastly different than yours, that might change whether you want them to read for you.

In my most recent beta round, I used a google form to do a quick survey to see who was interested in beta reading. This worked really well for me and I would recommend it! You can also use this to make all potential readers agree to not share/distribute/plagiarize your work, so you have it in writing just in case someone were to try something.

This was also a great way to see which genres they usually read and how many times they have beta read in the past!

TL;DR: Get readers who LIKE your genre. Read their writing and see how they write. Use an online signup form to narrow down.

3. Be Clear About The Type of Feedback You Want

This is perhaps the second most important thing when you get readers. Many readers will shy away from reading your work if you have nothing in mind for them to look out for. Also, being clear about this shows that you 1) know it isn't perfect and needs work and 2) you have insight into what the issues already are.

For Alphas, these traits are what I have found to be the most helpful:

Immediate inline reactions - particularly emotional engagement and pointing out lines that resonated with them

NO grammar/stylistic comments (unless incomprehensible)

Questioning of worldbuilding, character decisions, and character development - particularly if confusing or unclear

Comments on action sequences & their readability

Comments on believability of the plot points/progression

For Betas, these are what have been most helpful to me:

Comments on grammar, especially if repetitive

Stylistic comments, particularly for over-used words or noticeably repetitive sentence structures

Comments on pacing

Comments on plot initiation point and buildup/execution of the climax

Not questioning my worldbuilding/plot and trusting that what I have written is intentional. Only pointing out areas that have on-page evidence of inconsistencies.

Everything above is simply personal preference. You might find other comments to be better for alphas/betas. However, being upfront about which comments you want or don't want can drastically change which people want to read for you!

Some readers are obsessed with in-depth inline grammar/style comments, some aren't at all. Some writers LOVE these in-depth grammar comments, and some don't. Being clear about what you want is the best way to make sure you and your readers are compatible for the stage of editing you're at.

4. Swapping / Compensation

So this one I might have a bit of an unpopular opinion, but I wanted to cover it because so many people talk about it on here and other sites.

Again, based on my personal experience, swapping and compensation does not mean you're going to get better feedback or have a better experience or relationship with readers.

For the record, for everyone who beta reads for me—and finishes—I always offer to read theirs, even if it's a genre I don't like.

Personally, I have never tried compensation (re: money) for beta readers. However, there are a few issues I've come across with swapping:

Mine was beta ready and theirs was unpolished first draft

Our types of feedback didn't align

Our genre preferences didn't align

Their feedback was nowhere near as high quality or constructive as mine

In these cases, one or both of us burnt out on reading the others' work, and then we'd both bail. Especially with #4, it was very disheartening for me to spend hours finding their plot holes, helping them come up with ways to fix them, for them to then write 1 paragraph about what they thought of my story that was extremely surface level. To me, that wasn't even a swap, and was practically worthless. There was even one who got sensitive about the feedback I was providing (which was a queer sensitivity read) and then left almost identical comments on my story, which weren't even relevant. It was like revenge-commenting.

All this to say: I have had positive experiences with swaps. My alpha for twtr was a swap and I really enjoy her work and she enjoys mine, and we will probably continue to swap forever.

This goes back to #2 above: be picky & choose your readers well. Your story is your baby, and it deserves to be critiqued by people who value you and your story, and want to help you make it the best possible version of itself.

To summarize, I have had two good swapping experiences. I have had 10+ good uncompensated betas—with an offer for me to read their stuff when it's ready. Do with that what you will.

5. Writing Community / Groups

On to a more positive note! I have had the best experience here on writeblr, and this is coming from someone who has tried multiple other communities (which I discuss in the last section below). Having my own discord server from tumblr, joining a few other writers' discord servers, has completely changed the game regarding finding consistent betas, more resources, and just having an overall much more positive time writing and editing.

Writeblr keeps me grounded, keeps me hopeful, and even if I share something that doesn't get tons of notes, it's so nice to have interaction. It's so nice to give and get back, consistently.

I do want to emphasize the importance of giving to get back. If no one is liking/interacting with your excerpts, tag/ask games, etc. then that's probably because you're not interacting with them! It's very important to show interest in other people's work!!

I'm not saying you need to jump onto everyone's taglists for all their wips, but join the ones that genuinely interest you the most. Play in ask/tag games consistently. Follow writers back who follow you (if they post things you're interested in, ofc).

I have the same amount of followers as the people I follow right now, and I think that goes to show that people reciprocate here on writeblr! It's a lovely community and don't be afraid to reach out ❤️

I have found almost ALL my recent betas from my tumblr and discord groups. They have been lovely so far and I would highly recommend building up community here if you are interested in finding betas.

6. Websites/Resources for Finding Betas

Alright, last section. Thanks for bearing with me. I'm going to go through the sites I have used, and why I still use them, or why I dropped them.

Scribophile

So, for starters, this is one I don't use anymore. This was the site I first used when I had a polished draft in 2020 and had no idea how to get feedback. Essentially, they have a point-system. The more comments you make, the more points you get, and then when you have 3 points, you can post a chapter. It continues in a cycle.

Pros: Personally, I think the site helped me a lot in realizing what a bad critique looks like (which is helpful!) and also helped me learn which comments/feedback types work for me, and which don't. I don't regret my time there by any means, and I found one life-long friend and beta reader there I wouldn't trade for the world. It also allows you to post/remove your story and the readers don't have direct access to it—meaning if they want to download/steal/plagiarize, they'd have to copy and paste or screenshot chapter by chapter. It's a little safety precaution.

Cons: It's not the best place to get constructive feedback. The issue with their system is it encourages quantity over quality in critiques. Because of that, you'll get strangers rewriting your entire chapter in their own style so they get 2-3 points for one critique, but... was any of it actually helpful to you? Maybe, maybe not. It's also random, so you can't control who comments on your stuff, and they might just comment to get points even if they hate your genre. I also don't think it's fair to have to do 3-5 chapter critiques in order to save up enough points to post ONE chapter of your own. And if you want to post your story for full beta reads and control who reads it and who doesn't, you have to subscribe monthly.

So I keep an eye on it occasionally to look through their forums on writing, agents, publishing, etc. But most of the forums gets nasty, because there are a lot of really pretentious writers who think they know all the rules. If you join small groups (e.g. sub-groups based on diversity, etc) they tend to have better and more meaningful discussions.

Personally, I would never use it for beta/alpha/feedback ever again. This is the site where most of my bad swaps came from. But you might find it useful! So I thought I would share it.

Nanowrimo Forums

This is another one I don't use anymore, but might consider reusing in the future. The biggest issue I have with nanowrimo is that a lot, and I mean A LOT, of these participants are first-time writers and have no concept of what polished vs. unpolished even means. I did find two really good swaps there (actually the only two good full swaps I've had) but those were very hard to find.

There is also the issue that a good chunk of them only write during November, not year round. So for finding consistent, year-long partners, this is not the best option. I'm a member of 2 discords that have all fallen silent as soon as Nano actually ended.

Also, in my experience, asking questions about anything related to "controversial" topics (especially trans and minority ethnic groups) becomes toxic very quick, which is unfortunate. There are even a few moderators who seem to be contributing to the toxic/immature discussions rather than fixing them/shutting them down, which is the main reason I stopped using it.

However, it's a GREAT place to get free, simple covers! Their artisan section is fantastic and there are a lot of people there willing to make basic covers/banners for you for free.

BetaBooks

I've only been using this one about a month so far, but I'm really liking it. It's set up that you can invite betas to your story specifically, or you can look through a beta reader library, read their profiles, and invite them to see if they're interested.

This is essentially an alternative to Scribophile. It allows you to post your story online and find betas and become a beta.

Why I like it better than Scribophile: it's not a point-based system, meaning it's uncompensated so the readers have nothing to gain other than enjoying/helping your story. There's no hard feelings if someone bails. It allows you to see all comments in one place (which Scrib can't do). (And with discount codes found through google, it's cheaper, too. Message me if you need help with this 👀)

It also is all online, easily removable, so readers would have to copy/paste or screenshot chapter-by-chapter to steal it. So again, just a little safety net that makes me feel better.

Writeblr

Yep, that's right. Right here. Actually right here on tumblr has been where I have found the most beta readers and in the shortest time. I talked about this in the section before so I won't regurgitate. But there's a reason why this community is so long-lasting. It really is the best one out there I've found.

TL;DR / IN CONCLUSION:

Know where your book is in terms of reader-readiness. Know the difference between alphas/betas and polished/unpolished. Know the types of feedback that work for you and specifically request it when recruiting betas.

Interact with a community. Give interaction in order to receive, and don't expect people to reblog/like your content if you don't reach out first. Join small, niche writing community discords. Find like-minded writers.

Decide to swap or not, but this won't make or break you.

There are many writing communities out there designed to help you not only find betas, to provide beta-reading feedback forms and commentary. Try them out and see what works best for you.

And above all, thank Writeblr for being such a lovely community ❤️

[rin-fukuroi]

𝐀 𝐠𝐢𝐟𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐨𝐟𝐟 𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐭 [𝐖𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐥𝐞𝐲]

Please do not translate or publish my works without my permission.

The originals of my works can be read here

Fandom: Genshin Impact

Pairings: Wriothesley x fem!reader

Warnings: none, just b-day fluff~

Note: English is not my native language, so I apologize if there are errors in the text qq

I am, as always, very punctual, so I almost made it to the birthday of this hot cryo man (o´ω`o) I'm sorry if there are typos in his name and correct me, please, because I'm posting this at five in the morning and I feel like I'm going to fall asleep at the computer, but I couldn't put it off until the morning anymore XD

You glance nervously at your watch. Another tedious working day at the Palais of Mermonia is about to end, and you are looking forward to visiting your friend. Of course, you didn't need some special day to see Wriothesley, and you didn't need an excuse to just burst into his office and share another cup of tea with him, which, by the way, you did quite often, but today… Today you just have to get him to the surface.

Although you knew perfectly well that your feelings towards the duke would probably never be reciprocated, and you knew that this man was "married to his job," the desire to see him as often as possible still never left you. You rejoiced at the fleeting moments when you could see his sincere, but slightly tired smile, rejoiced at the sound of your name flying off his tongue, rejoiced at every modest gift that Wriothesley handed you after each visit to the Fortress (often, of course, it was cosmetics that Sigewinne left for you when she couldn't give it away personally, but sometimes it was also gifts from the duke himself, who carefully supplied you with tea that you might like during your meeting), but gradually became more and more greedy, wanting to get more.

It's so selfish to think that one day Wriothesley will leave the Fortress and finally break out to Fontaine to see you more often, however, what's wrong with just dreaming about it sometimes?

When the hands of the clock finally move to the cherished eight o'clock in the evening, you happily jump up from your chair, no longer feeling the same fatigue. This happens every time you plan to visit Wriothesley, but today you feel a special surge of strength that you want to direct to ensure that this day goes perfectly. Everything has been planned in your head for a long time, down to the smallest details, although you know that it has rarely happened that your grandiose plans have been fully realized, but you are ready to make every effort to ensure that today goes exactly as you imagined it before going to bed for several weeks in a row.

You cheerfully run out of the Palais, briefly saying goodbye to the melusines who are vigorously waving after you, and go straight to the Fortress, anticipating to see the soft smile of Wriothesley, to whom you will fall in without warning.

A few nods of greeting to the guards at the entrance to Meropid, and here you are already going down in the elevator, nervously fiddling with the strap of your bag slung over your shoulder. This path leading you deep under the water seems especially long today, and you excitedly shift from foot to foot before the doors finally open in front of you, giving you a view of the floor on which the entrance to your friend's office is located.

For some reason, all your resolve melts more and more as you approach his door. Of course, your plans will hardly please the Duke, but isn't it already too late to worry about it?

You slip through the heavy doors, taking a deep breath before finally climbing up the stairs. Your curious gaze immediately catches the slightly disheveled smolny strands of hair and the gaze of a man sitting in his usual place concentrated on the papers on the table. Risley seems to be so immersed in his work that he doesn't even immediately notice that someone has snuck into his office without warning until your figure appears in his field of vision, forcing the man to look up at you with a tired look.

— You're uninvited, as always, — the duke jokes, smiling gently and turning his attention back to the pile of documents stacked on the right side of his hand sliding over the paper.

— And you, as always, are not ready to break away from work even when a friend comes to visit you!

— Y/N, you should have already remembered that you can feel like at home here. I still have to finish… — the man's words are cut off when you audaciously interrupt him, banging your palms on his weighty wooden table.

— Wrio, today we are going out for a walk on the Fontain, and I don't accept a refusal! — your eyes are full of determination when Wriothesley looks up, meeting your gaze.

The duke sighs resignedly, crossing his muscular arms over his chest, as if thinking about something before finally answering.

— As you can see, I have a lot of work to do.

— Come on. You're idle most of the time. I hardly believe that during your long rest you don't have any urgent business, — you raise an eyebrow disapprovingly, taking the same defensive pose as Wriothesley.

— I told you that I don't like to rise to the surface unless absolutely necessary. It costs me a lot of effort to dodge the interview of that journalist from the "Steam Bird", you know. If she sees us…

— She won't see it! And if she does, I'll deal with it, I promise.

Another dissatisfied sigh, and Wriothesley still gives up, reluctantly getting up from his chair.

— Well, you said it yourself, so I'll leave the role of my personal bodyguard to you for today, — the duke chuckles softly before slowly walking towards the stairs.

It's amazing how easy it was to get him to sign up for your adventure, but you're still elated, almost skipping along after Wriothesley.

— Ah, ah! How upset will all your fans be when they find out that your fists and those threatening gloves have lost to the fragile girl you entrusted to protect yourself!

Wriothesley's velvety laugh and your quiet giggle bounce off the metal walls as the two of you go downstairs, casually exchanging jokes before finally the heavy door slams shut behind you.

✧ ✧ ✧

— So… And where do you want to go? — Wriothesley asks, finally coming to the surface of Fontaine. A soft breeze blows the short strands of his hair and the jacket draped over his broad shoulders.

— Mmm … — you smile mysteriously, proudly raising your head. — I have everything planned!

— I'm already scared.

And so your little adventure began.

The first point was the cozy cafe "Lutes", where you had a snack with crepes before going for a leisurely walk through the streets of Fontaine. Wriothesley was confident and unyielding, even when every second resident of Fontaine considered it his duty to cast an alarmed and amazed look after you both. The duke, so casually strolling around the city, really excited the Fontaine people even more than any appearance of judge Neuvillette among the common people, but it didn't seem to bother you particularly, judging by the fact that you were still as relaxed as usual with your friend about everything and nothing at the same time.

Wriothesley looks at the streets and people around with interest, which he usually never had enough time for even when he had to go up to the Fontain. You catch every look of a man, not missing the opportunity to once again examine his features and every scar adorning his face and neck when he turns away to hold his blue eyes on something that attracted his attention. He looks so relaxed, even though he doesn't show that he likes it, and you can't help but feel elated at the realization that, although you had to get him to sign up for your idea, Wriothesley doesn't seem to mind at all just walking with you like this.

After a small snack at Louis's diner, you both visited the fountain, admiring the bright lights of lanterns lit up all over the Fontain when the bright moon rose over the region. The time flew by as quickly as it always did when you managed to share it with the duke. It's so unfair. This evening is really special, and how would you like it to never end, and you just feel the presence of a loved one next to you for at least a few more hours before you are left alone again.

But this is impossible, and the realization that you will soon have to part one way or another settles with bitter sadness in your chest.

— Hey, Wrio… — you suddenly stop when you both gradually complete a circle through the streets of Fontaine, inevitably approaching back to the entrance to the Fortress. The man hears your quiet voice behind his back and also stops, turning around to look at your gloomy figure. Wriothesley wanted to ask what suddenly managed to break your fighting spirit, with which you accompanied him all your walk, but you suddenly smile again, looking up at him. — I want to… go somewhere else.

✧ ✧ ✧

Waves smoothly flow to the shores of the outskirts of Fontaine, caressing the soft sand. The light sound of the water is so soothing, and you take a deep breath before plopping down on the grass under a tree standing alone near the walls of the city. Your gaze immediately clings to the majestic Moon reflected in the crystal clear water when a cool breeze touches the skin of your face. Such quiet, peaceful evenings are usually meant for lonely thoughts or romantic dates, but you are here today for none of these reasons. You hear quiet footsteps and a short sigh from the man behind, who reluctantly sits down next to you, resting his palms on the soft grass and fixing his gaze at the sky.

— It's been a while since I've seen the moon, — Wriothesley breathes in fresh air, closing his eyes for a moment, and you finally turn around, looking at the peaceful expression on his face.

The gaze unconsciously slides down his tense forearm muscles under his black shirt, his chest heaving in time with the measured breathing and his legs stretched out on the grass.

"And I haven't seen you like this for a long time…" — you would like to say out loud, but you swallow your sentimental desire, and straighten up, shifting your bag onto your lap.

— Wrio… — you mumble softly, and the man mumbles back to you, still without opening his eyes and continuing to enjoy the quiet murmur of water and the distant sounds of the Fontain getting ready for bed.

The man feels your hand touching his shoulder, and opens his eyes slightly, noticing how you look at him, awkwardly pursing your lips. Your cheeks are lightly powdered with blush, and the fingers of your other hand are nervously fiddling with the lock of the bag, and Wriothesley also straightens up, paying all his attention only to you.

— In general… here, — you hesitate, but then you hurriedly take out a small box from your bag and hand it to him.

For a moment, the duke's eyes widen while he just looks at the small gift intended for him, lying in your palm, but then he accepts it, without hesitation opening the lid. A silver tie clip, decorated with a small ruby, shimmering in the moonlight, lies neatly on a miniature gray pillow when Wriothesley carefully takes your gift out of the box.

— I'll understand if you don't wear it, but… happy birthday, Wrio, — you look away, blushing even more, while the man just looks at the little thing without saying a word.

You're ready to sink through the ground on this very spot. His silence doesn't mean that he didn't like your gift, does it? Oh, you really could have given him something more useful, but in the end you presented him with what should be on his tie, comforting your selfish desire that your gift be with him every day, glimmering somewhere in the depths of your soul.

You're almost ready to just hurriedly say goodbye and run away to your home to bury your face in the pillow and replay this awkward moment in your head an infinite number of times to drive yourself into even more despondency, but you hear a quiet click and turn back to Wriothesley, noticing that his tie is already decorated with silver jewelry, which he is looking at with a slight thoughtfulness in his gaze before looking at you.

— Mm, I think it's not bad, what do you think?

Your lips open, and the words get stuck somewhere in your throat when you just look at Wriothesley in a discouraged way.

The man grins, amused by your reaction, and lets go of his tie before leaning towards you.

If before it seemed to you that time was so inevitably slipping through your fingers like sand, now for the first time you felt it stop at the moment when you felt the touch of Wriothesley's warm soft lips on your flushed cheek. The scent of his perfume has cut into your nostrils, and you are ready to swear that you will never be able to forget him again, as well as this short kiss, which will now always burn the skin of your face whenever the image of Wriothesley will pop up in your mind.

Your face now seems more like a frightened otter, just frozen in shock when Wriothesley pulls away, barely restraining himself from laughing at your funny reaction.

— Thank you, Y/N.

[intellectual6666]

The line between us (Part-2)

Synopsis : The guy slowly unfolds his feelings for her while she does everything to prove herself.

Genre : Enemies to lovers.

Warnings : idk if this is called suggestive

Not proofread (terrible grammatical errors and some spelling mistakes)

More under cut ~

Just working hard wasn't an option. She had to prove it to him why she was one of the best Sales manager their company had.

So that is what Kriti did. She worked day and night. Visited places and interacted with customers. Tried to bring as many changes as she could. Hired more people. Made more teams to work under her.

Aadarsh, on the other side, kept thinking about her. There was something stingingly good and bad about her. In the very first meet, he grew a strong dislike towards her. But he couldn't identify why. He just didn't like her demeanor. But also, a small, tiny part inside him craved her. That part wanted to know more about her. Become close to her. Grab her attention. This was so unlike Aadarsh. He never had such mixed feelings for anyone. He always had been clear whether he liked a person or not.

This kind of worried him. But he didn't have to worry more. More work was piling up for him and mainly, Kriti was ready to show him.

Next meeting day

As Kriti showed her presentation and explained the pluses and minuses, she could feel a strong gaze burning through her skin. She didn't dare to look at that direction 'cause she was sure she would get distracted and won't be able to complete her presentation.

Completing her part, she asked "Any questions ?"

"Yes", Aadarsh answered.

She was more than ready for him.

"Yes Sir"

"What skills do you prioritize when hiring new Sales team members ?"

Thinking for a second, Kriti listed all the points she prioritize and explained them.

"Tell me Ms. Kriti, do you really think you're doing a good job ? I want an honest answer."

"Ofcourse Sir. I do think I'm doing a good job. I might not be the best sales manager but I know I do my portion perfectly, perfect enough for any unnecessary questions.", she answered.

"Well, let me open your eyes. You cannot handle all of your work. To show me what you can do you took up so much work and completed them in a haphazard way...." and he went on, trying to point out loopholes. As each second passed by, Kriti grew more and more angry and also, started feeling humiliated.

"I'll help you with your work."

It caught her off guard. But she regained herself and said, "Thank you sir but I don't need that much help."

"I'm doing a favour. And I'll do it. I don't want your permission."

Times like these made Kriti disgrace her position. She wanted to become the top one in the company, so that nobody had the courage to say such things.

Okaying to the response, they resumed the meeting.

Kriti agreed to work overtime. More because she wanted to show "Mr. COO" how perfect she is with her work.

She was doing some paperwork, when she heard the door of her office open and close. There he was, Aadarsh Mukherjee, with beautifully pleated pants and beige shirt, rolled up sleeves and rimless contacts.

"You might not know that you should knock before entering someone's room."

"I am the COO. I don't need to do such manners."

"I don't care if you're the COO or CEO. Manners are manners."

Raising an eyebrow, he glared at her. Walking towards her, he tried to regain his composure and said, "Sorry ma'am, I'll keep that in mind."

Wow. That was very unlike him. Kriti stared at him for few seconds, trying to digest what he just said.

"Shall we start ?"

"W-what ?"

"The work, ofcourse."

"Oh. Yes."

After working straight for an hour, an argument broke out between them.

"Sir, that's not how this works."

"You don't teach me how it works, I've done it like this for years and it worked like magic. Try to learn new things Kriti."

"You're the one who's not trying to learn new things."

"I've come here to teach you new things."

"So what? That doesn't mean you can't adopt new styles in the mean time."

Huffing, Aadarsh replied slowly, "Okay Kriti, I'll learn it. But can you learn this for now ?"

"I'll learn that when I need it. If the work gets completed smoothly the-"

He trapped her between his thick arms and the table. His eyes pierced through her skin. Kriti was dumbfounded. She just looked at his eyes, searching for something, something which will explain what was happening between them. They felt each other's energies. The attraction.

"Try. To. Learn. Kriti." He paused between every word.

Kriti couldn't focus. The surroundings suddenly grew thick and the space felt smaller. As his face came dangerously close to hers, Kriti could sense her heart hip-hopping inside the cage. She didn't want this. Then why isn't she pushing him away ? Why is she letting his cologne intoxicate her mind ?

Before thinking further or breaking the limits, Aadarsh said, "Let's be patient and learn things, alright ?"

"Okay", her voice was barely above a whisper.

Leaving her, he sat down on the chair and continued the work.

She thought that he didn't care about what happened few moments ago, but little did she knew that he was losing it. His heart drummed inside his wide chest and his hands were sweaty. He wanted to slap himself for this sudden behavior, but he also loved that feeling.

He did the what was forbidden in his life. He fell in love.

Is he going to go further or take a step back ? Will Kriti acknowledge the emotions which are buried deep inside her or stay with her initial hatred for him ?

*******************

Worse than before but okay. I'll try again.

Don't repost. Reblogs are appreciated.

Tagging : @liacriesalot @shadowseductress @zeherili-ankhein @lotuseaterwhowistlesthedark @bareillyki-barfi @priimadonnna @fets-luck

[tarotwithdanise]

Your future best friend's personality

1 - 2 - 3

SOURCE AND CREDITABLE : All of the pictures are collected and downloaded from pinterest , I don’t own any of them but credits goes to the rightful owners however edits goes and the reading itself belong to me. I use the editor tools canva and ibispaint for the header and divider. If saved/downloaded the divider use a proper credits and tag/mention along my acc @tarotwithdanise. Expect grammatical errors with this reading, bear with it because english isn't my mother tongue.

💌 check out my back-up account @danisetarot bio ; click the link, choose your favorite deals that you wanted to purchase and then send all of them to my email account (daniseallure@gmail.com)

Pile one

This is someone who already on their spiritual awakening. They are someone who you can't just tricked and fooled easily, this person makes you think twice of all your actions. They are smart people, if you play trick ways, they will know it immediately without any hesitation because they are mastermind. You will meet this person to any spiritual groups and places. It can be that this is where they work or they're someone who used to teach others. People come at them to ask for their advices, they're great mentor. They like to inspire and be inspired. They might come off as mysterious and secretive individual too. You two will create a strong foundation of friendships. It's not yet the right time to reveal themselves fully to you. But all of i had said was the highlights of them.

Pile two

-this gonna be long compared to previous pile, this person is like an open book.

If I were describe this person, they always look at the bigger picture. Most likely, this is is someone who have vision board or they already have an idea what they want to be in the future. Most likely this person is someone who have a young spirit or probably younger than you. They enjoy and love to try new things, they're adventurous and brave individual. They're quite rare individual and ready for any change that surrounds them, in fact they're risk taker and will enjoy traveling around and across each country - they're adventurous individual. I see that they're talkative individual, someone who likes to share their MU's and crushes to you. They're typically jolly and has an extrovert personality, they like encouraging people. If I am not mistaken this person is probably the one who will try to get you out of your comfort zone. I picking up a strong masculine energy so they maybe a boy? but they can also be a girl that just embodied a masculinity. The cons of their traits is that, they experience unstable mental health and might have a very childish attitude, they probably has a lot of break downs with their past that's why. It's like they see their past self to you, that's why they're trying their best to help you as they can with pure intention.

They might be young but their experiences is level up into the next level that most of their ages doesn't yet uncover. I do also see here that even though they not really a ‘star pupil’ or a ‘straight A's pupil’ their classmates or their co-workers likes them to be their leader ; someone who will guide and lead them into a project or teamwork. Some people feels very irritated towards them because they're very jolly, hyper and friendly, somehow their friendliness can affect you because you only have them while they have many choices but what's more interesting here is that they're longing always for your presence, you maybe way more matured and intelligent when it's comes to logic rather than them so this is one of reason why few people take an advantage to their innocent and kindness. And what else? They prefer and like more to share their problems and secrets to you more rather than to their other friends. Like they typically see you as their only lifetime best friend while the rest of their friends is temporary. You tickled this person heart, you got their full trust. This feels like a friendship between a straight forward and trash talker person with their wild and funny friend.

Pile three

This is someone who maybe from a well-off family, it's either the relationship with their family is okay or in other way, it's broken. This is someone who is same age as yours, they likes traveling whether inside or outside of country. They also likes country music and artists. They are not emotionally stable and may need someone to lean on. It's hard for them to somehow find balance between two choices. This friendship may lead from friends to lovers, if both of you will pursued this connection. They may not be good at decision making but they are kind person and will do everything to share the life they have to their friends and other people. This person might own atleast one pet at their home and probably someone who may like the color of black. They maybe act spoiled and stupid sometimes but they're totally kind, it's just they used to act one. They may have an unpredictable nature and maybe someone who hold a lot of responsibilities even though they can't.

© tarotwithdanise ── all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, alter, or repost my work in any other social media platforms with or without my explicit permission.

[eleventhhourfactor]

Factor Builds a Poltergust!

Part One

Poltergust?! In my kitchen?! At this time of year?!!

More probable than you might think.

For those who didn't see this post a few days ago, I've been building a prop Poltergust. I've got a costume to go along with it, and both are at the point where I can step out to an event right now and feel proud of myself.

After I find fingerless gloves and give the vacuum tube a couple more coats of paint, of course.

So, how did I do it? Why should you care about a ghost vacuum that can't actually suck things up? Well, I'm about to tell you the process I've gone through this week to get this bad boy ready, because I did a decent job documenting my steps and I wasn't just about to not share something like this.

Ready?

Here we go!

Disclaimer

This is not a tutorial. I am not in the business of giving Poltergust workshops. This is just me documenting my process, which you're free to riff off of for your own uses, but this is in no way a step-by-step instructional. This is what I got after gleaning two walkthroughs online and distilling them into something my artsy ass can manage. If I tried to pass this off as a tutorial in real life, I'd probably get fired.

If you do reference this for your own purposes, make sure to wear gloves, put down cardboard and other protective coverings, and do your work in a well-ventilated area. It should go without saying, but do not let your pets into this shit.

With that being said, let's get into the base of this whole thing.

The Base

Not gonna lie, this whole idea started with a cat carrier. It's been with me for several moves now, and neither of my cats have taken to it. Needless to say, I was ready to give this thing purpose.

The carrier I have has a bubble in the front, several panels to zip and unzip, and appears to be made of some kind of leather. With this in mind, I prepared the surface for painting by using a deglazer. If you can't find any (or you run out early like I did), some strong isopropyl alcohol and a bit more elbow grease will also do the trick.

Next, I went with some leather acrylic paint. It went on nicely and dried quickly, so I did a couple of coats.

As you can see in the picture above, this carrier had a nice black trim to it that I wanted to preserve as much as possible—hence, drafter's tape. I also left the straps as is, since E. Gadd has a thing for leather straps on his devices.

After the paint was good and dry, I sprayed the whole thing a couple times over with a clear topcoat. I might've picked something semi-glossy (I really don't remember), but so long as it's clear and sprayable, it'll work.

I did get a little bit of topcoat on the bubble, but this really won't matter in the long run.

Panels and Wheels

Each Poltergust I've come across has a set of wheels or cylinders on the sides. Seeing as this was a consistent choice, I figured I'd cook something up to cover the side panels of my base.

Each wheel piece is based on a wooden circle (mine are about 6.5" in diameter). From there, I glued a smaller foam disc onto the center, and then covered each disc in gray foam for a smooth look.

While waiting for that to dry, I then took a triangular dowel of EVA foam and painted that black. One calculation for the circumference of the inner circle later, and I had the outer rims for these pieces. For error's sake, I rounded up.

End result?

Snazzy. Now to apply this and the other panels onto the base. I chose a thicker piece of black foam for the accent paneling, which also went under these circles. However, I didn't immediately glue all this on.

Instead, I went to work on some other doodads.

Doodads, part one

There are a number of holes on the cat carrier. They come in sets of three, are ringed with metal, and were probably intended to provide airflow to my spoiled little fur babies. For the Poltergust, though, these holes provided opportunities for additional decorations.

All of these holes were 1" in diameter, which made some of my choices awfully convenient.

First off: bottom three. These are the reason I held off on gluing the panels. I wanted to cap them and put some lights behind them. Some little jewelry organizers did the trick, and provided a nice serrated edge that I used many times in this build.

Now, this photo is a bit out of order. I got a bit impatient and glued the side panels and these things on before I did the topcoat. As a result, I sprayed them a bit. Again, I like to think this works out in the end.

At this point, I was ready to take my foam and do all sorts of measurements and shit to get it all to perfectly align. And then I realized...

Foam is impressionable, and these suckers are serrated.

With that, I pressed my front panel into the circles, carved out the holes, and was able to slide it on just like that.

From there, I eyeballed and trimmed it down before gluing. And I got the circles hooked up as well.

Doodads, part 2

I came across some black desk feet that, with some nuts and a piece of foam glued in for good measure, made for some nice button-looking things on the side panels. Because I needed to work on the tube, though, this won't get applied until closer to the end.

The Tube and the Tools

The bones are good, but what about the tube? The means by which a ghost goes from outside to within?

This, along with lights and other device pieces, required a trip to the hardware store. Believe it or not, I spent quite a bit of time in the plumbing section for this stuff. Kinda funny when you think about it.

Anyway, tube. I went with a drain and bilge tube/pipe thing because it was long and flexible—not to mention easily cuttable with a hacksaw. It's attached to the Poltergust with a metal closet rod support, which again, was about the diameter I needed.

All good, right? Wrong!

That tube wasn't just gonna go into the hole nice and neat. After getting the metal circle around the tube, I cut some slits into it to cheat my constraint, further forcing it in by applying sealant to the circle and clamping that shit down.

Hot glue is nowhere near strong enough for this part. Given that it's metal, on the most vertical slope, and is gonna get tugged around a bit, I opted for sealant. Please keep in mind this shit is strong, so let it cure outside.

Since the sealant takes a while to cure, we can pretend I got everything in one trip and get started on the flashlight attachment. I found this PVC pipe thing that had a slideout bit of pipe, and something about the way it felt in my hand screamed "comically big flashlight". With that, a bell drain cap thingie, a puck light, and some paint later, I had Luigi's flashlight, ready to screw in or change out with a nozzle (which isn't built as of posting. I'm tired and it's daunting and I want to go back to writing.)

But like, wow. I'm a bit screwed when the batteries die, but for this? This is beautiful. See that black bit at the bottom? That's meant to screw into the thing pictured below.

Which, fine, there is a bit of a time skip with this top. But the whole idea is to stuff it with sealant, follow up with hot glue, and put it on the end of a trimmed down, painted bilge tube. To paint the tube, stick the whole Poltergust in a trash bag, poke a hole in it, and feed the tube through. Tape up anything loose, get that spray paint, and spray.

Rule of thumb: do not assume any of my steps are chronological. I'm going off of categories to make a bit of sense out of my madness. A lot of parts were painted in batches because I was waiting on something else and I wanted to save time.

But, once things are painted, glued, and sealed, the worst of the work is over.

That being said, we are far from over. I'd keep going, but Tumblr on mobile won't let me do more than ten pictures, so keep an eye out for the inevitable reblog featuring part two!

[zeggyzone]

off-air | isekko

iso/gekko (valorant) tags: love confessions, domestic fluff, feelings realization, snuggling & cuddling, might be ooc, cross-posted on ao3

synopsis: while iso is trying to blow off some steam after a stressful day, gekko texts him. fifteen minutes later, he's in his best friend's room on wash day. bonding ensues.

sfw. 5.1k words.

notes: - most of this was written at 3-5 am, so if you see any grammatical errors, *no you didn't.* - iso and gekko have a pre-existing friendship; a close one at that! they have platonically held hands, hugged, all of that while trying to break iso out of his shell :) - sorry if it's out of character - i also wrote this while listening to iso and gekko's canonical spotify playlists, along with the isekko playlist made by lili on spotify! - the name of this fic in my documents is "The Oneshot Where Iso and Gekko Confess Over A Bathtub On A Random Tuesday" hahaha

STOKYO DRIFT, Cemetary Drive I said I’m ready to cash out I said I’m ready to– I said I’m ready to– I said I’m ready to–

Iso exhales.

Just a round at the Range. It’s that simple. Blow off some steam, Zhao Yu.

It’s that simple. No strings attached. It was just him, his Raging Hunter (which he customized with the help of Raze just a while back– she helped everyone with it at one point, and Iso was on her supposed list of clientele), and a bunch of robot dummies.

Truth be told, Iso didn’t even know why he was here. In recent meetings with Sage, he found himself sitting across from her in her own bed, talking about the nightmares he experiences on the daily. The gunfire, the blood, the flashes of violet.

Especially the gunfire.

Yet here he was, Raging Hunter in his hand, doing the one thing he knows how to do in a last-ditch effort to calm himself down. He pulls back the hammer with his thumb, exhaling as he flicks his arm towards the ‘start’ button, squeezing the trigger ever so slightly–

Bzzt.

What.

Iso tries to ignore the buzzing in his front pocket, gently vibrating against his side. He steadies his aim, but it buzzes again, and he sighs, holstering his Raging Hunter, and pulling out his phone.

SECURE SERVER_VAL.VP // PRIVATE MESSAGE: GEKKO-ISO

GEKKO [15:41 UTC]

yo yo yo can u help me clean wings ?

Iso blinks.

You have to send five back-to-back texts to get that point across?

ISO [15:42 UTC]

Why so sudden ?

GEKKO [15:42 UTC]

yk how he gets and he likes u Hes fussing so fuckin bad rn holy shit

[SYSTEM] Gekko sent an image. [A 0.5x photo. Gekko looks disgruntled at the camera. He’s in a black shirt, and you can see Wingman crawling out of the tub.]

Iso almost laughs.

ISO [15:42 UTC]

Let me clean up. Ill be there in 15

GEKKO [15:43 UTC]

THANK YOU DUDE I was going actually crazy you are like a life saver

ISO [15:42 UTC]

👍

Thumbs-up? Thumbs-up?

Holy shit.

Iso unholsters his sidearm, putting on the safety as he makes his way to the teleporter, walking through it with a shudder (he’ll never get used to it) and making another healthy stride toward the locker room. He passes Omen’s desk, glancing at his bonsai tree left with a refilled watering can as he puts four of his fingers on the handle, the fingerprint scanner whirring and clicking the locker open with a little green light. Iso puts away his gun in the tiny mold left in the back part of the locker.

On the little hanger for his mission outfit, he has a woven bracelet Gekko made him a few weeks prior; red, purple, white, and black in nature. He took it off before training. It means quite a bit to him, and he would hate to mess it up.

He goes to close his locker, looking at it for a moment, hesitating, then closing it.

He was going to help bathe Wingman– he doesn’t want to get it dirty.

Iso’s sneakers pitter against the floor, narrow steps suddenly growing heavy as he approached Gekko’s door. He knocks, putting his hands in his pockets immediately after.

Gekko doesn’t seem to notice, as Iso hears small Spanish curse words leave his lips behind the muffled door. Iso shrugs, pushing the sliding door open with a small huff. He closes it behind him and walks towards Gekko’s bathroom door, generously left open for his incoming guest.

The sight is comedic. Wingman is hurdled over his owner’s shoulder, trying to squirm his way out of Gekko’s grip, both hands reaching outward like a baby trying to reach something. Gekko has his hands on Wingman’s chubby jelly sides, holding him back with an iron grip. Wingman suddenly falls limp at the sight of Iso, except for the grabby hands that continue. Gekko turns around, confused.

“Oh, shit, you’re here.” His eyes widen, letting go of Wingman. He hops down to climb Iso like a jungle gym, and Iso picks him up before his pants get any soap on them, walking over to the tub once again, and placing Wingman in.

“Let me take off my jacket. I can’t really help with all this stuff on–” Iso says, turning on his heel. Gekko gives him an acknowledging ‘aight’ and very gently scolds Wingman to stay.

Iso walks to Gekko’s bed (his radivore sling was notably discarded on the bed— a pair of eyes look at him) tugging his hoodie over his head. He neatly lies it on the end of Gekko’s bed, having done so quite a few times before (Gekko often called Iso up for a friendly hangout that consisted of Iso knocking out a few hours into their gaming sessions). He looks at the gloves on his hands, removing them with the tiniest bit of clamminess.

He feels weird without them.

He tucks them into the pockets of the hoodie, sliding over to Gekko’s post, and kneeling on the bathmat. Wingman looks up at Iso expectantly. “I’ve never… washed a radivore before.”

“All good. It’s pretty damn simple if you ask me. Just lather the little guy up with some soap until he’s extra squeaky clean. It’s the same for the rest of my crew.” Gekko explains, handing Iso the soap along with a little glove with bristles. Gekko has one on his non-dominant hand. “And you literally can’t mess this up. Bro loves you.”

Iso nods, taking it. “Pfft, I hope so,” he responds, feeling the warm water against his one bare hand.

He’s not particularly used to having his gloves off. Sure, he takes them off when he has to, but otherwise, they stay on. He feels practically naked without them. The same goes for his headphones. His little earbuds are in his ears, playing music low enough to the point where he can still understand what Gekko is saying.

UBER EATS, Northside Hollow & Ethan Ross

Gekko watches as Iso puts on the glove. He places his bare hand to hold Wingman gently as Iso puts a generous amount of soap on the garment, lathering it on Wingman’s jelly head. He watches attentively, folding his arms on the edge of the bathtub to rest his head in. Gekko takes in the sight in front of him; Iso, in his bathroom, washing his little buddy with all of the benignity in the world.

Iso glances toward Gekko, a small huff leaving his lips, “So you called me here to do your dirty work for you?”

“No, I called you here to be Wingman’s .. uhh, social … buffer. He likes you. I’m using my resources to my advantage! Boom.” Gekko moves his hands to the best of his ability despite resting on them– his animated self refuses to go unseen even in a moment of exhaustion. “He’s been fussy all day,” Gekko reaches his gloved hand to lather some soap on the radivore’s back, “but the second you show up,” a short breath, “se convierte en un angelito.”

Iso understood ‘convierte’ and ‘angelito’ when placed together. He assumed from context clues… “He turns into an angel.”

He stifles a laugh.

…

“Hey,”

Gekko blinks, “What’s good?”

“I’ve been wanting to ask–” he keeps his gaze on Wingman, but he can feel Gekko staring him down, “–we never exchanged names. Of course, we have our callsigns, but … that’s different. I just feel since we’ve been hanging out so often we should refer to each other as something more … uh, friendlier than … Gekko. Or Iso.”

“Oh?” Gekko furrows his brows, running his bare hand through his prickly green hair, “Damn, you’re right,”

It was… odd, admittedly, but, when he really thought about it, Iso was right. How many weeks has it been? Hell, it’s probably been a bit more than a few months. He’s been hanging out with this guy almost non-stop and yet, they don’t know each other’s actual names.

Iso knocks him free from his thoughts. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

“No, no, I’m so down. Just, how do we like, go about this? Like… yo, man, my name is blah, blah, blah.”

 Iso offers a playful smile, “Rock, paper, scissors for it?” he asks, swatting his bare hand in the air to remove excess droplets, drying it to the best of his ability. “If I lose, I go first. And vice versa.” He holds his fist out to indicate the beginning of the game.

Gekko laughs, a small grin on his face as he puts his fist up. “Oh, you’re on.”

“Aight– rock, paper, scissors, shoot–!”

Iso plays paper.

Gekko plays scissors. “Tough luck.”

Iso lets out a small laugh, returning to washing Wingman. He keeps his gaze on the radivore, feeling Gekko’s eyes burn into him like fire.

“My full name is Li Zhao Yu.” Iso makes sure to accentuate every letter.

“Li … Zhao Yu,” Gekko repeats it back to him, getting a few of the syllables wrong, but Iso is quick to correct him— gently, of course.

“Shit, that’s cool. So, it’d be just Zhao Yu, right?” He asks after the mild training, lifting his head up from the side of the tub, holding himself up by his chin.

“Yeah, basically.” Iso shrugs, returning to washing Wingman.

“Yo, could I mash those together? I think that’d be a pretty sick nickname,” before Iso could say anything, Gekko spits out, “Zhayu. It’s like, not even that different, but, it sounds cool as fuck, right?”

Iso looks at Gekko, eyes wide.

“I don’t have to use it if you don’t wanna—“

“No,” Iso says almost immediately, “I mean— no, I like it. I just haven’t had someone give me a nickname in— I don’t know— forever,” Iso admits with a small laugh, rinsing Wingman. “It’s nice. I like it.”

Gekko lets out the tiniest sigh of relief, “Good. I didn’t wanna like, overstep.”

Iso nods followed by a small hum of acknowledgement. “It’s your turn.”

“Oh, yeah— we doin’ full names, right?”

“Mhm.”

“Oh man,” Gekko says between a laugh, pushing himself to sit up straight. He reaches over for the towel on the counter, holding it and awaiting Iso to hold him up, clearing his throat, “My full, legal, name is Mateo Armendáriz De la Fuente.”

“… what.”

Gekko laughs even harder than last time, “Dude, that’s why I asked. It’s kind of a mouthful.” He bites back a laugh, “You can just call me Mateo.”

“Mateo … Armen—what? Woah, you’re right,” Iso says with a tiny laugh punctuating the end of his sentence, “if you think you butchered my name, I wouldn’t even know where to begin with yours.”

He then realizes the meaning behind his words, quick to defend himself, “I’m not saying your name is weird or anything— it’s just hard for me to pronounce— or uh, remember, in that sense.”

“Maybe I should just stick to Mateo.”

Gekko laughs, thankfully.

“I’ll learn your full name, trust me,” Iso says, drying off Wingman like a little baby.

“I know, man.”

“But, now that I’m looking at you… you really do strike me as a Mateo.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Gekko raises a brow, a little smile on his lips.

“Oh— nothing, it just— makes sense?” Iso quickly explains, not wanting to offend.

“Dude, you’re chill. I’m just playin’.”

Iso blinks, turning back to Wingman. “One more thing,”

“Yeah?”

“Where did your crew’s names come from?” Iso asks out of the blue, holding Wingman up in the air next to his head, making him face Gekko with him.

“Honestly, most of them kinda just … came to me,” Gekko admits, not having an exact answer. “I kinda named them based on their whole ability thing—? I dunno how to explain it.”

“Dizzy has that plasma thing— and guess what! Makes people dizzy. Get it?” He shrugs, “Wingman’s kinda self-explanatory. He’s my wingman.”

“Then, uh, Thrash. She was kind of the more aggressive outta-all of them? And if we’re goin’ back to the whole ability-based-name-thing, Mosh seems pretty self-explanatory too, yeah?”

“I guess— makes more sense now,” Iso shrugs. “And that’s pretty cu—“

Cool.

“— cu-ool,” Iso catches himself, making a weird new word in trying to save himself from that embarrassment.

He quickly holds up Wingman for Gekko to dry, and lest Iso’s anticipations, Gekko doesn’t take Wingman from his hands, just running the towel on Wingman to dry him off.

Iso feels Gekko’s hands against his, hindered by the towel between them as he holds Wingman while Gekko pats him down to dry the little guy. A tiny rosyness creeps up to the round of Iso’s cheeks as he watches Gekko’s hands, hyper-aware of the fact that they would be touching if it weren’t for the towel working as a barrier.

Iso looks away, tapping his finger on Wingman as gently as he can to the beat of the song playing in his earbuds.

Gekko’s eyes flick up to Iso midway through the task, and he smiles. Gekko smiles up at Iso and he returns it without a second thought.

“Yo, you’re all red, amigo.”

No fucking way.

“Há? No, am I? I’m not, no, it’s just the light, no?” Iso sprints through his words, looking at Gekko everywhere but his eyes. He utters a curse in Chinese, tilting his head away in an effort to hide his supposed blush. “Sorry.”

backseat, jungle bobby & lentra.

“Pfft,” Gekko lets out the tiniest giggle, “It’s aight.”

Iso comes back to reality when Wingman shimmies out of his grip, running back to the harness on Gekko’s bed. He almost begs the little radivore to stay– to save him from this terrible situation. He thinks he could die.

Instead, Iso looks at the radivore harness like a broken man, and Gekko laughs even harder, forcing Iso to get up.

“I’m grabbing my hoodie.” He announces, shuffling towards the bed.

“Oh, come on– I don’t mean to tease–”

Iso rolls his eyes, falling onto Gekko’s bed, face first. He grabs his hoodie– gently pushing Gekko’s harness out of the way– now pulling the pull-over up under his chin as a pillow. 

He didn’t want to believe he was in love with his best friend, but Iso knew he was too far gone to even deny it anymore. The way Gekko laughed, the way he teased him, the jokes he made, and the considerate things he did for him, whether it be making little woven bracelets or buying him Boba whenever he went out— that was all casual, right? It had to be.

Gekko walks out– Iso doesn’t notice– and sits near the headboard, looking down at him with yet another teasing grin. It’s fucking lethal.

Then, with that smile, Iso realizes.

Of fucking course it wasn’t.

Iso averts his gaze, jaw dropped as he came to that realization.

“Relax, bro. You’re gonna pop a blood vessel.” He hears Gekko say.

Iso shoves his face into his hoodie. There’s silence until Gekko asks the burning question,

“Were you going to say that it was cute, or am I crazy?”

Iso groans. “Do we really– do we really have to talk about this now??” He says with half of his speech muffled as he finally peeks up from his hoodie, blush flaring into his pale skin.

“I mean, you’ve slipped up a lot like that before. I dunno why you’re tweakin’ right now,” Gekko shrugs.

That sentence makes Iso’s heart drop.

“I’ve what.”

Gekko looks at Iso and is met with a beautiful picture; he’s resting on his bed (his!) and his eyes are a bright violet, looking at Gekko with a wide expression. If Gekko could peer into his mind, he’d only find that Iso is so embarrassed that he might as well have been stripped bare in public– but despite all of it, he finds Iso sprawled like this endearing. It’s hilarious, even– how did Iso not notice Gekko noticing all of the little moments? The stolen glances, the lingering touches, the late-night talks– Gekko almost laughs at his obliviousness.

The silence is almost suffocating, so Gekko begins, “Zhayu,” a breath, “you’re not as slick as you think.”

Gekko looks at Iso’s hands, and they’re balled into tight fists, and when he looks into those raging violet eyes again, they’re twitching.

“And…” Iso sounds out of breath, “You never told me?!”

Gekko blinks. Then he howls.

“No! Don’t laugh–!“ Iso pushes himself up, kneeling on the bed in a position that would definitely make his feet numb later, “Gekk– Mateo. How long? And— just how many times have I slipped up like this around you?” Iso curses just a few seconds after the delivery of that sentence, running a hand through his hair, forehead moist.

Gekko sits up straight, adjusting his sitting stance into crisscrossed, looking away as he puckers his lips, drumming his hands on his thighs, “Man, you know… like… was I supposed to count?”

Iso’s eyebrows drop.

“Mateo, I will strangle you right here, right now.” Iso threatens, but his hands don’t move from his knees. Gekko looks at him with a dubious look, and Iso realizes he isn’t exactly feeding into the whole ‘fear factor’ of it. He’s quick to lift up his hands in front of him and exaggerate the motion as if he’s moving Gekko’s head back and forth like a maraca.

It’s silent.

Then, it’s enough to make Gekko fall into a giggle fit. Then, Iso gets mad that he’s not taking his threat seriously. Then, Iso is so mad that he starts laughing. Hard.

He’s hurled over on his knees, holding his stomach as he falls onto his side, just next to Gekko’s knee, and his gut hurts. His gut hurts from laughing, and Iso realizes he’s laughing with no one better than Gekko himself. Iso cough-laughs, covering his mouth. Gekko is hitting himself with his fist, smack dab in the chest to stop himself from coughing. Iso remembers the little ‘I lowkey have asthma’ and one last laugh bubbles out from his throat.

He looks at where the woven bracelet Gekko made him a few weeks ago would be and imagines it; purple, white, red, and black, all woven together to create a sense of Iso in itself.

He feels naked. Yet the mirage reminds him that he would protect it with his life.

Gekko deflates, his arms lining up behind him to keep himself steady. His head falls to where Iso’s head is, then his unusually bare wrist.

“Where’s your bracelet?” He asks, reaching over, and tapping on the little pulse point where it would be. “I thought you liked it.”

“I didn’t want to mess it up when we cleaned Wingman,” Iso breathes, his voice tired.

Gekko hums.

Iso blinks.

“You’re my best friend, you know that?” Iso says blankly, feeling Gekko’s fingers brush up against his wrist ever so slightly as he retreats them back to hold himself up. Iso’s fingers twitch with anticipation. He bites his lip softly, looking at Gekko’s surprisingly soft hands, despite them looking so rough.

Iso keeps half of his face in the sheets, left cheek squished up against the surface. He rests on the bed, getting comfortable with Gekko at his side, legs crossed and looking at him like he is a piece of valuable, fragile treasure and not the cold-hearted ‘Dead Lilac’ killer everyone made him out to be.

No, Iso corrects himself, not everyone. Me.

Iso is who makes himself out to be the Dead Lilac. He leaves that behind today; hopefully forever.

“And you’re mine, querido.” Gekko breathes, his foreign tongue slipping. Gekko registers what he said seconds later, quick to change the subject, “You look like a cat like this.”

Iso mumbles, “Querido? What does that…” But he gives up halfway through the question, mostly because he knows Gekko won’t tell him what it means. “A cat?” He instead asks, raising a brow. Gekko flicks his cheek, and he mumbles a small “ow” as soon as the stinging feeling occurs. “I’m not going to meow if that’s what you’re asking.”

A chuckle, “That sucks.”

“Ew, you want me to meow?” Iso feigns a laugh, hiding his full face in the sheets to muffle the tiny effervesce, before coming back to look up at Gekko. “You’re so weird, Mateo.”

“Hater.”

Iso sticks his tongue out, lifting his right arm to flick Gekko’s nose.

“Ow.”

Then it’s quiet. Iso hates quiet.

“Teo. I want to ask you something.”

supernova, Godly the Ruler.

Gekko feels like he knows what’s coming. “Ask away.”

“Have you ever thought about …” Iso pauses, looking away to regain some of the composure that he lost as he began the sentence, “Have you ever thought about us? And what we are?” Iso exhales, unaware he is holding his breath. “Because I don’t know what we are at this very moment.”

Iso had avoided eye contact for so long. He brings himself to look at Gekko, and he looks at him the second the look in his best friend’s eyes alters.

“I have.” A deep breath, “Many times.”

“What do you think about? What are we?” Iso asks.

He quickly adds to the end, “To you?”

“I…” Gekko purses his lips, “Well, right now. We’re just homies, yeah?”

“At the moment … I’d say so.”

Iso looks at where the bracelet would be— a fond reminder of their camaraderie. Then he looks into Gekko’s eyes and finds the same unreadable look. He looks at Iso’s wrist with such fondness. Happiness. Content. A secret fourth thing. Iso finds comfort in it.

“What about everything else you’ve thought of?”

“You really wanna know?”

“Do you want to tell me?” Iso asks, avoiding Gekko’s gaze, and he realizes that their two hands are almost grazing— holding each other. Iso’s hand twitches again. “If so, yes.”

“Pfft,” Iso swears he sees a mischievous glint in Gekko’s eyes, “Least serious… uuh…”

“I’ve thought of kissing you.”

Iso’s face distorts, pursing his lips as he shoots up from his lying position. “Least serious?! That’s the most uncasual thing I can think of!” He almost shouts out of pure shock. He’s not angry, just confused.

Gekko belly laughs, his hand smacking onto his stomach to support himself, “I’m playin’! There’s stuff before that, tonto.”

Iso wants to smack him for messing with him like that. That thought is wiped when he sees the red against Gekko’s ears and he’s done for. Smitten.

“And… compared to other shit, I think that’s pretty tame.”

…

“You’re so gross.” Iso blurts out.

“What? You wanted the truth, so you got the truth,” Gekko holds his hands up in defense before falling next to him again, “and to give you the whole truth, if I were to tell you what I’m thinking now, it’d be... that… ay…” Gekko’s right hand returns to his face, covering his mouth and trailing down his jaw, “maybe there have been times I’ve thought about us– and not as what we said we were a few minutes ago.”

Iso understands those connotations. He looks in the middle of their laps, almost touching. He exhales.

“I would say that the thought is mutual.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” A pause, “... Yes.”

“Mateo, I—“ Iso purses his lips. “I can’t imagine my life without you in it.”

“You welcomed me. Open arms. I don’t know if you… if you knew, but, you invited me anyway. I didn’t know if you were just like that with everyone, but– either way, you– you are just… perfect. I got to know you and I was like, how could anyone ever hate this guy? You’re everything, you’re all that there is right, and, wǒ qù, I can’t even fucking describe–” 

It’s hot. Then Iso realizes why.

Gekko leans in, pressing their lips together in a tender, soft embrace. Iso’s lips are the tiniest bit chapped against Gekko’s fairly soft ones, and he eats it all up. He relishes the feeling of his lips on Gekko’s— his best friend.

He stays like that for a hot minute, pulling away and looking at Gekko like a lost kitty who had found homage in him. He catches his breath.

“... I didn’t know how to shut you up–”

“Oh my God.” Iso smacks Gekko’s shoulder and in return, he pokes him in the side.

Iso jolts, letting out a quiet yelp— one that’s a bit out of character for his assassin background.

Then Gekko has a devious look on his face.

Was the fabled ‘Dead Lilac’ … ticklish?

Iso quickly covers his mouth in embarrassment, grip tightening as he realizes the noise he just let out. He looks at Gekko.

“No way.”

“No. It wasn’t anything. That wasn’t me, it was … Thrash—“ Iso quickly tries to back himself up, hand slipping from his mouth and immediately going to cover his sides as a last defense.

“Uh-huh. And where is Thrash?” He asks, nudging his head towards his harness as his hand reaches over to an exposed part of Iso’s side.

“Mateo!” Iso quickly scrambles away, rolling over to the other side of the bed, getting on his knees, and holding his left arm in front of him, creating distance between them as his right arm wraps around his own waist, trying to protect himself from an impending tickle attack.

“I will wrestle you on this bed and win.”

“I have little siblings and cousins. Fuckin’ bring it.”

And then he pounces.

The tickle match is full of empty threats, foreign curses, and lots of giggles. Too many. There was a cackle here and there, maybe even a snort. By the time it ended, Gekko fell from his place on top of Iso, lying next to him with a few laughter-filled coughs. Iso catches his breath.

“Mateo,”

A breathless “Yeah?”

“I wanna be your boyfriend.”

Iso’s headphones die.

A deep breath, “Can I?”

Iso stares at the ceiling. He notices Gekko is, too.

It’s quiet. So fucking quiet.

But Iso can handle it now.

Gekko is next to him, their arms are touching, and the silence isn't deafening for once. He feels the energy in the room and it doesn’t suffocate him, if anything, he’s breathing better.

“Yeah. I think I’d like that.”

Iso turns on his side. Gekko faces him.

Iso’s tired expression shifts into a happy, close-eyed smile as he tackles Gekko into a bear hug, invariably pushing him down onto the bed, putting his full body weight onto the poor guy, hugging him tightly. “Thank you.”

Gekko let out an involuntary gasp as Iso suddenly tackled him down onto the bed, nearly winding him as felt Iso’s full weight. He laughed softly, the air knocked out of him as he lay there under, returning the hug with equal enthusiasm, wrapping his arms around Iso and holding him tightly against his chest.

“Yeah, mi corazón,” he said softly, “Thank you.”

“Corazón,” Iso exhales against Gekko’s neck, pushing himself off from the top, “what does that mean?” He asks, breathing against Gekko’s chest, cheek squished against it. He holds him softer now, breathing in Gekko’s cologne.

“My heart,” Gekko says, a careful hand running up Iso’s clothed back, drawing small circles, “you are my heart, Zhao Yu.”

“If I am your heart,” he feels Gekko’s heartbeat against his cheek, “then, you are my treasure,” Iso smiles, “bǎo bèi.”

“Bǎo bèi…” he repeats sleepily, “mi tesoro.” Gekko breathes.

“I love it when you speak Spanish, Teo.” Iso says, nickname rolling off his tongue tiredly. “I don’t understand it, but it’s…” a huff, “nice.”

Gekko has a feeling he wanted to say something else, “Yeah?”

Iso realizes he’s fucking done for (again), “¿Te gusta cuando hablo español, mi tesoro?”

“Augh, stop it,” Iso rolls his eyes, pushing Gekko’s face back by his chin, looking away, laughing just a little bit. “You’re such a tease, sha bī.”

“Aww, is that another cute nickname?”

“No. I called you an idiot.”

“Oh. Chúpamela.” Gekko deadpans, flicking Iso’s forehead with little to no remorse.

Iso laughs and realizes that this is all he has ever wanted. This was bliss, and Iso has felt this way for as long as he was in Gekko’s presence. He moves ever so slightly, just so he can smell Gekko’s cologne, and his new boyfriend allows it. It smells of lemon zest with the faint undertones of green apple and vanilla. Iso swears that he can smell the tiniest bit of cedarwood. That combination with Gekko’s personal musk makes him dizzy. (Pun intended)

“You smell good.”

“You like my cologne? I wanted to try a new one.” Gekko says breathily, drumming the pads of his fingers on Iso’s back in a rhythmic pattern.

“I know. You smelled different.” Iso mumbles, inhaling. “I like this one better, though. The other one was too…” He thinks of a descriptor, “Smoky.”

“I used to layer two colognes,” Gekko admits, “The footnotes on it were tobacco, vanilla, then uhh… truffle, I think.”

“Too smoky.”

“It was a gift from Brimstone. I felt kinda bad,” He mumbled, “I’d feel better if he taught me how the hell he got his score so high in the video games in the basement.”

“You’re still trying to beat it?”

“Yeah.”

“… wait, you noticed that I changed my cologne?” Gekko blinks, looking down at Iso, who looks up to him bashfully.

“Maybe,” he exhales, adjusting his position to face away from Gekko, “it’s a very discernible smell— anyone would notice.”

“Sure.”

Gekko slightly spoons Iso, resting his head atop his, breathing in. “Damn, your hair smells like…” he thinks, “Tangerines?” he says with a slight hint of confusion in his voice.

“It’s just my shampoo,” Iso hums, shifting himself to tilt his head up at Gekko, “I like tangerines.”

“Me too,” Gekko says.

Quietly, Iso asks, “We just gonna stay like this?”

“What time is it?”

Iso looks at the alarm clock to the side. Before he can speak, his stomach grumbles, which prompts Gekko to ask instead, “Have you eaten?”

“I had breakfast.”

“You need to eat.”

Iso exhales knowing there’s no stopping Gekko– he’s already getting up and Iso follows that action. It’s quick, it’s swift, and his new boyfriend grabs his wrist and pulls him up onto his feet, intertwining their hands. They’ve held hands before– you know, in cases where Gekko is dragging him through a crowd at a festival or Iso has to pull him away from getting distracted while the agents go shopping. But this was different. The old Iso would probably tug his hand away, but the new Iso is comforted by this scenario– better yet, he seeks it. He never wants to let go of it and he doesn’t think he ever will. Gekko’s touch is grounding and Iso feels his mind go quiet as their fingers interlace. His free hand comes to remove his headphones and awkwardly puts them in the case, shoving his hand into his pocket.

“Alright.”

He’s gotten used to this.

hope you enjoyed! it's my second valorant fic i've written, so hopefully i did them justice.

here's my twitter! check it out please i need moots (not just valorant) LMAO

[absolutebl]

hello!!

i honestly think this is a really weird question to ask; but, in your opinion—what age group people should watch bl dramas?

i'm a teen atm who just reads bl fanfics, but lately i've been getting a bunch of bl drama fmvs on my recommendations on yt😭 and it kinda makes me feel tempted to watch the dramas, but i think i'm a bit too young for it, so i'd appreciate if you could tell me what age i should prolly start watching at :D

thank you in advance, i hope you have a good day/night!!

Hum, good question. I'm not sure. I started reading pretty racy stuff very young, so I don't think I'm the best judge.

But there are certainly BLs that if you read fanfic already, just have lite romances and a bit of smooching. So 13 maybe?

I wouldn't necessarily "recommend it," because I can't make that choice for you. You know yourself much better than I do. But there is certainly BL I would classify as YA in a section of a "bookstore," if that helps?

I think you'll want to try to develop a critical eye to the media you are watching/consuming in order to understand some of the messaging it's doing and the cultural leanings it has. Than you'll be fine. If you've waded into this blog, that's a start. It's all I do.

In other words:

BL is not produced in a bubble it's saying lots of other stuff beyond the romance and smooches.

So is all music, books, art.

Please just remember this stuff is for entertainment, not life guidance, and you'll be fine.

That said, since you're a teen, there are certainly many BLs that are very racy and high heat. And some that represent highly toxic relationships. These might be best avoided for now.

If you read BL fanfic or soft yaoi manga then I do have some rec lists that might work for you (stuck at the bottom) but they weren't written with teens in mind. So if you don't feel like your ready, don't watch it, and if you find yourself at all uncomfortable with the show (and I cannot emphasize this enough) STOP watching it.

Please always feel comfortable stopping a piece of media if you feel at all unsafe or uncomfortable or just don't like it.

There is always something else out there you'll like more.

Some quick "YA style" BLs off the top of my head:

My Love Mix Up (either Japan - VIki or Thailand - YT)

My School President (Thailand - YT)

Light On Me (Korea - Viki)

Seven Days (Japan - grey)

I Cannot Reach You (Japan - Netflix)

Wish You (Korea - Netflix)

Semantic Error (Korea - Viki)

Our Dating Sim (Korea - Viki)

Takara-kun and Amagi-kun (Japan - Viki)

Restart After Come Back Home (?)

Cherry Magic (Japan - Crunchroll)

Ingredients (Thailand - YT)

He’s Coming to Me (Thailand YT)

Gameboys (The Philippines - Netflix)

Old Fashion Cupcake (Japan - Viki)

About Youth (Taiwan - Viki)

I think it's no accident most of these are from Korea or Japan (mostly on Viki.)

Korea, in general, is going to be largely better for your age bracket, they specialize in soft BL with lower heat levels (with very few exceptions).

Japan can veer heavily in the opposite direction, so come ask me again if you find one not on this list and you're not sure, I can warn you.

Thai stuff is easier to find but it's all over the place and can get super super sexy.

Taiwan tends to go more adult content.

If you're confined mostly to YT because of your age, than you're mostly asking about Thai stuff. Drop me another Ask and I'll draw you up a specific list of YA Thai BL on YT but that might take me a bit of research.

[scaratastic]

My love.

in which how male genshin characters shows their love to you. ( might contain some grammatical error or even spelling mistakes idk i don't proofread cus we die like real men /j )

fluff

Kaeya

many people said that he's most likely to cheat on his s/o when in fact, it is quite impossible for him to do that.

man certainly has abandonment issues after losing both of his dads and his brother. sorry

i personally view him as the type to show you how much he loves you both by actions and words but slightly more to words (?) .

like he'd tease you about how beautiful you look, how gorgeous you truly are etc during times when he just feels like it but there's also time where he just wants to feel your body against his own, arms securing your body while inhaling your scent as you both cuddled before heading off to dreamland.

he'd certainly tease you during random times which will make you get all flustered. this man is full of surprises.

even if he's the type to always joke around and tease you nonstop, he'll always make sure that you know just how much he loves and cherish your existence in his life!

Diluc

he's the type of guy who'd buy you random gifts or give you some flowers that has special meanings behind it.

dinner dates or any type of dates that you prefer. yes, he loves to spoil you.

list all the things that you want, he'll get them for you. even if it is impossible, he'll find a way.

"if you're happy, then i am happy."

he gives everything to you. his love, his trust, himself, literally everything.

he might be a man of a few words and very awkward during the early stage of your relationship but he'll warm up later.

waking up in the morning with him cuddling you hehe

i can actually see him being a bit clingy here, specially when he overworked himself for the past few days. he'll definitely not let you go even if you squirmed and whined, reminding him that he has to wake up or he'll be late for work.

overall a very caring, kind, polite and a bit clingy type of lover. so take care of him please 🙏

Bennett

he would collect any pretty items on his adventures and give them to you as a suprise.

definitely brags about how you are literally so amazing and the best human to ever exist in teyvat to everyone.

"[Name] is just so amazing ! They can fight, they can cook, they can clean—" and so, the list of him praising you goes on.

adventures with him as a date. although he swore that the route that he chose for the both of you to walk through was literally clear a few hours ago, why there's so many monster there now ?

poor boy thinks that it's because of his bad luck. but hey, atleast he got the chance to admire your fighting skills while getting ready to brag about this cool moment of you to katheryne and his friends.

he's just smitten over you okay

Razor

he's clingy.

you can't blame him though, sometimes you just get so busy that you don't have time to visit him in Wolvendom.

he knows your scent and probably recognised the sound of your footsteps so whenever you came to visit, he's already waiting for you on the entrance of Wolvendom.

would escort you to a safe place before asking you to sit as he lays down with his head on top of your leg and buried his face to your stomach.

silently asks you to play with his hair because it's comforting.

okay but just imagine you both in that position beneath a tree, and then you read or tell him a story.

he would grow curious about it and asks questions from time to time. oh, and his reactions are priceless.

like he'd gasp, gets excited when the character from the story that you told him was about to have a good ending and probably huffs and groan when the story did not go well.

picnincs with him mhm. feed him and he's all red. would probably return the favor to you.

Albedo

he probably doesn't allow you to visit him when he's in dragonspine too much because he's worried about you.

but when you do visit him though, he'd ask you to sit down on the chair he provided while lending youb a hot drink to warm yourself up.

this little visit would often turn into study dates. when he sees you curiously observed his movements, he would ask you to come to him as he lends you his notes and explains to you what is his goal and so on.

yes, he won't just leave his job for you. but he'll talk and try to start a conversation with you just so you won't feel lonely and such. what do you expect from a workaholic anyw

would make some things that he thinks you'd like from alchemy and gives it to you.

"it reminds me of you.. so please, take it."

Venti

a date in the tavern.

him flirting like crazy with you as you turned red and shamelessly flirt back. Diluc often kicks your drunk ass and your boyfriend out of the tavern because of this though.

if your're not the type to enjoy alcohol or doesn't like the idea of getting drunk with your boyfriend in the tavern as a date though, then don't worry ! this lil boyfriend of yours got it covered.

would probably try and convince you to sneak out and join him stargaze.

while you're both stargazing, he'd summon his lyre and plays with it while humming a soft tune that'll make the night much more comfortable and enjoyable.

you both would play around like kids afterwards, making some of the monsters notice your presence but venti would take care of them though ;)

during random times, he would just stare and admire you silently.

"have anyone told you that you look absolutely gorgeous ?"

throws random compliments during the most random time. like he'd literally say "you're very pretty you know." after you clear out a hilichurl camp and ofc you'd go like "what"

he's unpredictable. much like kaeya, he is full of surprises. so be prepared of whatever plan that he has in his mind.

njdndjdndjd i still have no scara and no primos i'm about to cry, but anyw should i do this for other characters as well ?

[neuroticbookworm]

I was not planning on writing a Step by Step analysis this week, because my mind was too frayed from all the anticipation for the next episode. But then @lurkingshan posted this, and it knocked something loose in my brain, and now here I am.

Shan talks about how even though Jeng and Pat felt the spark of desire when they met a couple of times before they became boss and subordinate, once they knew they had to be professional, they dialed it back using very different mechanisms.

Jeng chose to keep his emotions under control in the workplace, and he harbored and nurtured those feelings in private. Pat, on the other hand, was already under stress in the workplace, and as @ginnymoonbeam and @bengiyo discuss here, he also misinterprets the initial strict mentoring from Jeng as proof that the spark he felt must've been all in his head. That his gaydar made an error, and therefore Jeng must be straight.

So when episode 8 begins, the mutual interest from their initial interactions is the only thing Jeng knows for certain, to assume that Pat might want a relationship with him. He also tells Tae that Pat never looks at him the way he looks at Pat, which makes the confession a pretty huge leap of faith from Jeng.

In the dance floor confession, Jeng observes that Pat is not ready for another relationship yet. He still confesses his feelings, but adds that he can be the safe space for Pat if that is all he wants from him. And that he will never want for anything more. He has already resigned himself here to the fate that he might never get to be Pat's boyfriend.

@respectthepetty explains here that Jeng would've fully gone along with Pat's understanding that Jeng is straight. He was forced to show his hand and come out when Pat referred to himself as Jeng's friend. Here, Jeng was no longer planning on making his feelings clear to Pat. He had no choice but to do it.

In the aftermath, Pat reacts with confusion, dawning realization and horror, and we know that Pat is reeling from this information because his mind is now doing a speedrun of all of their interactions and reevaluating them with the fact that Jeng is gay. But Jeng, oh my poor Jeng, thinks Pat is horrified for two reasons: the previously stated reason offered by his rational and logical brain, and the reason offered by his panicked and frantic brain that Pat is horrified by his advances, and that Pat never liked him in the first place. That he was utterly and completely wrong, right from the glass jelly incident. This thought may not have found deep roots in his mind yet, but it is there, floating and waiting for confirmation.

Now, some speculation for episode 9 (aka clowning). We see Pat has taken the day off, which further fuels Jeng's fears. And later Pat looks visibly unmoored and exhausted, like he hasn't slept for a few nights in a row. I was talking to @chicademartinica and she mentioned how Pat looks like he is disassociating in this episode. And I agree, he looks fully out of it.

Whatever happens that forces Jeng to confess AGAIN, I don't know yet. But what I do know is that there is a high possibility that Pat might say no after this confession, because he needs more time to process things. But, in Jeng's mind, that floating thought will finally get its confirmation and take root, and it will go, AHA I KNEW IT, HE HAS NEVER LIKED YOU, EVER.

I know we are all anxiously waiting for the slowburn to end (hopefully it'll happen before the sun swallows us whole), but we may need to hold our horses. Because the possible roadmap I see right now is: Jeng confesses -> Pat says no -> Jeng thinks Pat has never liked him and drowns himself (and us) in angst -> Pat finally finishes thinking and realizes that he does like Jeng -> Pat tries to tell Jeng -> Jeng is already packing his suitcases to flee the country OR Jeng has built his mental walls so high that Put can't get through to him without a massive effort -> Pat convinces Jeng to hear him out -> They finally sit down and talk to each other -> JengPat FINALLY BURNS

My fellow sufferers of this cursed show, I will be the happiest clown if I get proven wrong, but I think it will take a while for these two to work this mess out, and I think it might take more than one episode *runs*

[lala3244]

When the protectors are gone

Hello! First time writing for obey me ! I hope you will like it.

This is a first part, but depending of the response I might do more as I have a lot of ideas for the rest.

Also, english isn't my first language so I am sorry for any grammatical errors and other... and I didn't proofread it.

I wanted to say that the beginning is quite gorish but it's not the aim of my story :) so it stops after the description

WARNING: Description of torture, blood, cutting, eating flesh (if you think of anymore)

NEXT

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I have been for a few months as an exchange student in the Devildom, getting used to it was hard but it got harder when Lord Diavolo decided to bring another human for the exchange program. All the demons got infatuated with the new student, Amelia and I understood them. She was prettier and sweeter and nicer, and everything I wasn’t. The few times I talked to her I couldn’t blame the demons for loving her more but it didn’t lessen the betrayal I felt. I was becoming a nuisance to them when they had to walk with me to RAD when they’d rather be with her. If she wanted to talk to me, they would always come and interfere with our discussion. It was actually nice to speak to another human being but they wouldn’t let us or not for long. My only friends were the other exchange students from Purgatory Hall. They liked Amelia but they didn’t forget me and they saw what the brothers were doing to me. I would spend all my free time with them. 

One time, I even spent a whole week with them and none of them noticed it until Amelia pointed out that I was gone. I would walk to RAD with all of them but once the boys from the Purgatory Hall greeted me, they would all leave without even a glance. I tried to keep a happy front whenever I was with the angels as they did everything they could to make me happy but once I was at the Hall of Lamentation being ignored by everyone, my facade would crack and I would hide in my room. They never called me when dinner was ready. It was always Amelia who came to fetch me. I couldn’t hate her, she’s never done anything wrong and she was always thoughtful. We would get on great if it weren’t for the brothers always snatching her away. I felt truly alone, my protectors were gone even though they were just a few feet away from me but never caring. I guess I was destined to always be alone .

One day, we all walked to RAD but this time the two angels and the sorcerer weren’t there to greet me. I still followed the group but as usual they were ignoring me. I could see Amelia looking over her shoulders and trying to bring the attention to me but she failed several times. I sighed, annoyed with all of that. I decided to visit Lord Diavolo and ask him if I could go back to the human realm for a few days. I was walking towards his office when I could sense people looking at me. It had been like that for a few weeks now. I sped up, worried and I was almost running when I bumped into the Prince. He caught me and laughed. I smiled, embarrassed by what had just happened. “Hmm, Good morning Diavolo, I wanted to see you and ask if I could go to the human realm for a few days please?”. He looked at me but then shook his head and answered negatively. I stopped listening to what he was saying and walked away with tears in my eyes. 

I went to the bathroom to calm down, I couldn’t believe he would refuse me this simple request when I have been having a hard time because of him and them. He used to call me over to his castle to have tea but now he called Amelia all the time. While I was standing in front of the mirror, five demons entered the room, chattering. They all stopped when they saw me. I looked at them through the mirror and I saw them looking at each other with a dark grin on their faces. One of them approached me, and cornered me against the sink. My heart was beating faster and I was starting to get scared. Never before, other demons would approach me. I guess they all saw how the brothers treated me and that I was left on my own device for a few weeks now. 

The demon close to me started to say “Well, isn't it the human all alone.” The demon smiled but it wasn’t in any way friendly. The other four after summoning their demon form started to get closer and the first demon grabbed my wrist. I tried to snatch it away but the others moved all at the same time and grabbed each of my limbs. They roughly put me down on the floor. I hit my head on the floor and got dizzy. I tried to scream but a hand was on my mouth before a sound could escape. They shredded my clothes leaving me in my underwear. I tried to move but I couldn’t. Two of the demons were on my left leg, they started to cut through my skin with their claws. I closed my eyes at the pain but suddenly I felt an even worse pain. I looked to see one of them biting a morsel in my leg. I was terrorised by the scene, I was being eaten alive by demons. 

While this happened, the one holding my left arm dislocated it and started to cut through the flesh of my armpit as a butcher would do to prepare the meat they would sell. The one muffling me was cutting through my cheek, going over and over to deepen the wound. The one holding my right arm cut through the top of my chest leaving shallow cuts that he would go over again to make them deep. The one holding my right leg was carving letters on my stomach, first a “W” then a “H”. I managed to scream for a few seconds when the one with their hand on my mouth took it off to wipe their hands on their shirt. They would all talk to each other while torturing me, they were so proud they could finally have a human body to play with and they couldn’t wait to have my soul which was the brightest they’d ever seen. During this traumatic experience, I could hear a door opening and all of a sudden they all stopped doing what they were doing and looked at the door. I started to cry even more, closing my eyes, believing it was another one of their friends but in a few seconds, the hands that were touching me left one after the other. I could hear some noise but I was so overwhelmed by the pain that it didn’t register in my mind. Suddenly, I felt someone grabbing me gently and holding me close to their chest. I finally opened my eyes and saw Mammon, cradling me and saying “I’m sorry” over and over. I turned my head and saw 5 bodies standing up in reverse with their heads inside the floor of the bathroom. 

I giggled at the sight, delirious from the pain and probably from the blood loss. I looked at Mammon and using my “healthy” hand, I cupped his cheek wiping the tears flowing from his eyes. He was rocking me, eyes staring at the blood on the floor, repeating “sorry”. I tried to snap him out of it and slowly he looked at me, eyes watery. I smiled at him, relieved and thankful that he saved my life. “Mammon?”. He snapped out of it and grabbed his D.D.D. I could hear the conversation, Lucifer seemed pissed that Mammon interrupted him because of me but he heard the urgency in his brother’s voice and caved in to come and see what it was about. The first born arrived a few minutes later, annoyed and saw the five bodies upside down with their heads stuck on the floor, he stopped but he carried on looking. He saw the big puddle of blood just in front of us and he saw my form shivering in Mammon’s arms, bloody. He stood there speechless for a few seconds before moving into action. He called Barbatos for him to bring some medicine and he knew that Solomon, the sorcerer, was back from his errands so he would be available to tend to my wounds. Simeon, the angel who was back from the celestial realm, heard the commotion and entered the room. He gasped loudly and ran to kneel next to me using his healing powers to stop the bleeding.  Unbelievably, I was still awake after the ordeal and could hear and feel everything. Solomon arrived shortly after Simeon and also knelt near me, looked at me to assess the injuries, he noticed my dislocated shoulder and put it back in place while I screamed and Everyone was quiet for a while. He soothed me down with sweet words telling me I was strong and I should be proud of myself. I laughed bitterly as my eyes were tearing because of the irony. I was just a meek human in a world of demons and they had the upper-hand if it weren’t for another demon. Mammon was still cuddling me, whispering words I couldn’t understand as all my senses were overwhelmed in pain. Solomon and Simeon spoke between them and decided that I should stay with them. Despite my pain, I stopped them and told them I wanted to be in my room. Diavolo had agreed that I could bring my cat IF he stayed in my bedroom and I agreed to it as my cat was a scaredy cat so I wanted to stay in my room with my cat. If I had to heal he would help me. They each looked at each other but they all agreed silently. Mammon stood up as if I weighed nothing and started to walk back to HoL. During the walk I fell asleep, comforted by the second born’s warmth and steady breathing. 

When I woke up, I was in my bed, my cat curled up in my arms but I was still wearing the same clothes that I was wearing when I was attacked. I felt someone moving and I heard “So you awake?” I looked up and saw the beautiful angel sitting down on the bed next to me. I smiled, happy to see a friendly face. I started to scratch my face but Simeon stopped me, I looked at him confused. “You were going to scratch your wound on your cheek, it would be a bad idea.”. Then I realised that I was covered in deep wounds that would throb every second. I removed the sheet off my body with my valid arm and saw all the blood covering me. I sighed, it will be difficult to take a shower in the next few days as I couldn’t move my left arm. I started to speak embarrassed “Simeon? I need to take a shower and get some clean clothes, do you… do you think you can help me?” I didn’t look at him but I heard him hum in agreement and went to the bathroom. I heard the water running and took my D.D.D to look at the time. It was late evening, I slept all afternoon and missed dinner but still I had no messages from any of the brothers or of Lord Diavolo. My heart sank a bit, disappointed by the lack of worry from my supposedly protectors. 

The angel arrived and picked me up, princess style, careful of not touching or putting any pressure on my wounds. We entered the bathroom and he put my feet on the floor and I tried to stay up without falling down. I put my valid arm on his forearm to keep myself from falling. I could see he was a bit embarrassed at the situation and so was I but I couldn’t ask anyone else. 

I started to unbutton my uniform and Simeon helped me with the rest, he helped me to get inside the bath and as I sat down with great difficulty because of the cuts on my leg, he undressed himself. He sat behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist. I put my head back on his chest and we stayed in a comfortable silence for a few minutes. I started to relax, enjoying the angelic aura he was emitting. I put my hands on his and started to stroke them, they felt so soft, it was really soothing. After a while, I put my hair in the water to get rid of the blood in them and he grabbed my bottle of shampoo to pour some on his hands. He washed my hair taking his time to take the dried blood out. I hummed in delight at the fact that someone was looking after me. He helped me rinse my hair and wash the parts of my body I couldn’t get. 

When I was cleaned, he picked me up from the waist to stand up so I wouldn’t put too much pressure on my injured leg. He grabbed a towel and wrapped me in it. He picked me up again and laid me down on the bed. I looked at him quizzically. “Solomon was home concocting a balm to help with your wounds so we will have to apply it on clean skin.” I nodded and Solomon arrived at that moment. I moved the towel so it was around my chest. They both knelt next to me each on one side and started applying the balm onto my body. If I weren’t in pain I would have been really embarrassed at the situation; naked, on my bed, with two beautiful men who were massaging my body. I don’t know what spell he used but once the concoction was applied, I could feel the cuts and bites getting healed slowly and the pain was fading away. I was falling asleep as the massage seemed to last longer than it should have but I was not one to complain and when they stopped I opened my eyes. I gazed at the two men who were watching me with an indescribable look. I smiled slowly and asked them to help me get dressed for bed. Simeon agreed to help and put me to bed. “Simeon? Could you stay till I fall asleep please?”, “Of course, darling, whatever you need.” I cuddled up to his side and fell asleep straight away. 

I woke up with my alarm and felt a weight on my chest. I turned around and saw some white-haired coming from under the duvet. I frowned as Simeon had black hair and in my mind half asleep, it didn’t make any sense. I removed the duvet and realised it was Mammon. I laughed quietly at my stupidity and tried to move but the arm around me kept holding me tighter. I slightly nudged Mammon to wake him up and he groaned. I finally got free from him and sat up. My mind was getting clearer and nudged the demon again and asked him why he was there. He mumbled something I didn’t get so I leaned over him and asked the question again. He opened his eyes and got flustered at our closeness. I smiled gently and waited patiently for him to answer. He regained his composure somehow and explained that he couldn’t fall asleep so he came to see and saw the angel watching me sleeping and told him he could take over so Simeon could go back home and sleep. I nodded, happy with his reply. I took my phone and sent a message to Simeon, asking if he got home okay and thanking him for everything he did for me. He replied with a few typos but I got his message. I needed to put some ointment on my injuries in the morning. 

I stood up to have some breakfast without waiting for the second born but I had forgotten a tiny problem. STAIRS! I had trouble bending my left knee as some tendons were irritated by the claws’ marks. So I breathed in, held the ramp and took one step at the time. I heard people chatting downstairs so some of my housemates were already up. I was actually dreading seeing them, I didn’t want to see pity in their eyes. They should feel guilty, not pity. I didn’t have time to finish my thought as someone picked me up. “Ya’re lucky the Great Mammon feels pretty generous so I’ll help ya get down those stairs!”. I laughed “Thank you, Oh Great Mammon!”. He lowered me down at the bottom of the stairs and we walked arm in arm to the breakfast room. When we entered, everyone stopped talking and they were all staring at me. Amelia gasped loudly, her eyes watering. I guessed Lucifer downplayed what happened so the other wouldn’t worry too much. Mammon helped me sit down on my chair and went to grab a plate with all the food he could put on it. I looked at everyone around the table and they were all looking away from me, guilt showing on their faces. I was smirking, glad they were feeling this way even though I had to be tortured for them to remember I existed. Lucifer, who was also avoiding my gaze, told me that I was to stay home while I healed and each day one of them would stay with me for the day. I nodded, wondering how awkward our days were going to be…

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Thank you for reading till the end.

NEXT

[soleilnomoon]

Prompt: “I don’t like them; I can barely tolerate them.” for Abarai Renji. Once again, I leave it up to you what you wanna do (but maybe enemies to lovers) Yes, I might be on a little Bleach binge right now but it's okay you like it. kiss kiss

*hides face* ok, ok, ok, hear me out, let's pretend i didn't take *insert accurate length of time here* and say i wrote this in a few days. i am so sorry i took forever and ever with this but as u know i can only give u top quality work or else i'll never forgive myself. renji is.......well *motions to him* yk how that man is, he made me suffer!!!! in a good way!!! but still i suffered!!! yk how much i love enemies 2 lovers u big brained beauty 🤭 so ty baby❤️️ also this is my first renji fic and i can't belev it.

5.2k words (don't look at me, just don't), fem reader, nsfw, 18+ mdni, enemies 2 lovers, angst city, angst angst city biiiitch (yk the vibez babey), smut obviously, no fluff bc who do u think i am? feat. renji being a mean petty bitch (i guess that makes him a mean dom maybe yes), sub reader bc that's what i want; there's a party with alcohol, ichigo and co. make brief appearances, bathroom sex, choking (he's sf romantic), a lot of cursing bc they're grown that's why, renji is a beast when he's jealous, reader is a lil bit of a brat but lbr who wouldn't be in that situation; mutual ""unrequited"" pining, lots of tension, fingering, rough (consensual) sex, lil bit of degradation, lil bit of a size kink, lil bit of praise kink, idk there's probably more stuff but i'm so tired rn i can't think; um renji obviously comes w his own gd warning; reader is determined to not let this man win but, hello, it's renji he always comes out on top wink wink. (if u see spelling errors/mistakes no u didn't hottie)

“when i write about all of this it becomes its own kind of violence. / i retell the story as myth, as if it were my own body devoured.” — caitlin scarano & “so much of love is violence. the desire / to be split open, invaded, mangled / and made new.” — erin slaughter

HATRED X TASTES X SWEET

you’ve never been cut out for this line of work, but your insistence on eliminating all your shortcomings is commendable. brave, even. it’s something you don’t really think about unless you want to spend the night half-drunk, rambling about the things you should’ve done but never had the courage to do.

like telling a certain red-haired, bullheaded lieutenant that he’s the most ridiculous and excessively arrogant man you’ve ever come across. all in all, you’re pretty sure telling him off won’t phase him; nothing ever does, not really anyway.

at first you try politeness; your grandmother would be proud of how well you’ve learned to bite your tongue. it’s ungraceful, but you fake it well enough that others think your emotional maturity is far above theirs. little do they know, you actually have to literally bite your tongue; simply remaining silent isn’t easy for you anymore. so, when you bite, it’s with rage, months of unshed tears and accumulated spite; you bite your tongue so hard you bleed more every time.

your unsaid words bunch together — tiny soldiers determined to strike in unison without fail — and sit heavily in the back of your throat, ready to launch forward at your command.

but you never say them, and you choke more than once; an unbearable shame to carry with you as he continues to slash at your patience, thin ribbons cascading off you like confetti. you wonder if your anger will lead to your death— or if it’ll lead to his. you intend to keep all of that hidden, though, and keep reminding yourself that eventually he will tire from berating you, from talking to you as if you’re the most incompetent being in all of soul society, from looking at you like your very being disgusts him.

that’s what you tell yourself these days. you like to conveniently ignore the way his dark eyes linger on yours during meetings — you’ve noticed that people have taken to describing them as soulless, cold and critical, unimpressed at everything and anyone.

but you see him — all of him; the raw, feral, powerful and severe side that not many have the misfortune of knowing. they think they get the real version of renji whenever they deal with him, but they never do; you know that now. you doubt it’s even intentional on his part, or maybe — just maybe — he really does hate you.

to put it plainly, as you’ve told rukia and rangiku, the sixth division lieutenant has the biggest fucking chip on his shoulder. despite the walls he continues to put up to keep others from carving out a place for themselves in his life, despite the way his words roll around his mouth, clumsily coasting down the length of his tongue before they pierce the air around you with their toxicity — you’re tired of the way he purposely singles you out time and time again to point out your inadequacies without remorse.

abarai renji is also sick of dealing with you. whenever he thinks he’s found a means of scaring you off, you scurry right back more determined and more obnoxious than ever. which is rich, coming from him.

he claims you’re inconsequential, a nuisance — a pest, even — one that he intends to get rid of permanently. it’s harsh and he’s more than aware of that, but he finds that this is the most appropriate solution to his problem. he could easily ignore you; he could try to keep his comments to himself and try to be somewhat cordial whenever you cross paths. but he won’t. and he has no damn idea why.

“no, no come in, i have plenty of snacks for everyone.”

rukia’s voice is a constant in his life that he’ll always be thankful for. he watches her glide into the room, grinning at the friends she’s invited over, her laughter like soft bells that is easily recognizable even with all the conversation happening. when he feels his chest constrict, an uncomfortable, yet familiar warmth stretching over his skin, he decides to drink so that he can ignore the sensation and forget.

a feeble attempt, because he knows how this will all end — with him drunk off his ass in an even worse mood than he started.

mouth opening, renji prepares to tell rukia to get better sake, when rangiku leads you into the living room where he’s lounging comfortably. the bottle in his hand grows heavier by the second and suddenly he’s not very interested in drinking anymore. already, his foul mood from earlier returns, and every step you take only fuels his irritation; it bubbles underneath his skin, making him frown and grip the bottle tighter.

you don’t need to look at him to know that he’s glaring at you — he always is. rangiku feigns obliviousness as she encourages you to go make yourself comfortable while she fetches snacks with rukia. you stare at both of them, wide-eyed, confused — a pleading look sliding onto your face after a few moments, but they assure you both that they’ll be back shortly.

with a sigh you sit on the armchair adjacent to him, determined to just remain quiet in the hopes that he’ll just ignore you for once. sitting up straight, discomfort finds its way to the pit of your stomach, swirling around as you fidget with the bracelet around your wrist. his eyes watch your movements with an obsessiveness that startles him; there’s no reason why he should be interested in the shape of your fingers, there’s no reason why he should be interested in the way you keep brushing stray curls away from your face, and there’s no reason why he should be interested in possibly fucking you when he knows for a fact that he is absolutely uninterested in you.

his disinterest runs so deep it spoils the taste of the sake, but he takes another swig anyway. the alcohol burns as it travels swiftly down his throat, and it just so happens that you glance over at him — innocuous, an attempt to gauge his annoyance level — as his throat bobs and your mouth dries at the sight.

you turn your face away quickly, a traitorous flush crawling slowly along your skin, unjustly warming your cheeks. inhaling deeply, you do your best to will the blush away to no avail. where the hell are rukia and rangiku? surely it can’t take that long to grab snacks. you’re tempted to go find them, but you have a sinking feeling that it would turn you into a coward.

and you refuse to give that man any more ammo against you.

IT’S X (NOT) X YOU

what initially starts as a small get-together, quickly turns into a party; leave it to rangiku to liven things up, her laughter infectious and whimsical, flitting about like a persistent hummingbird as she encourages everyone to play drinking games with her. experience taught him better than to engage because despite his high tolerance, there’s really no beating rangiku when she’s on a roll.

but when you emphatically agree to play with the rest, fury rises in his chest; your audacity, it seems, knows no bounds — and, yes, he understands the hypocrisy in his critique. he just doesn’t care.

the games are every bit as simple and ridiculous as you thought they’d be, but as everyone seems to be in relatively good spirits, you play along. not normally competitive with things like this, you get into the swing of things when you win round after round.

cheers resound nearby at your success, but throughout the evening, you feel renji’s stare and do everything in your power to not give in and look back at him. a tough feat to say the least, as you are always acutely aware of his presence; and when you do happen to sneak another glance, his legs are spread and you curse under your breath for finding that attractive.

foolish, you chide, so fucking foolish.

renji sucks his teeth as he feels a heaviness in his head; groaning loudly he swirls around what little sake he has left in his glass before finishing it.

“you lose again,” rukia’s voice is soft and teasing, but he’s annoyed and can’t be bothered with talking to her right now. she pats his shoulder gingerly before standing up to head to the kitchen. his mind is a mess and he blames you for it completely.

“i don’t fucking care,” he says gruffly to her retreating figure, not bothering to elevate his voice as he’s sure she heard him. and he really doesn’t care; he’s trying to tell himself to calm down, but he can’t.

the fault completely lies with you — of course it does, everything you do agitates every cell in his body. the reason is simple, and he hates that he doesn’t want to admit it — he’s so undeniably attracted to you that it pisses him off. he takes in your appearance for the twelfth time that night, admiring the softness of your cheeks, the fullness of your lips, the way you seem entirely too animated as you laugh at someone’s lame joke — and yes, he can tell it’s not funny from how your laughter dies down after a few seconds.

if he had better sense, he’d stop looking at you, but he can’t now; he might blame the sake for this later.

the intensity behind his gaze is enough to bring an inextinguishable heat along your skin. it’s only unpleasant because it travels down to your lower abdomen and brings about an agonizing ache between your thighs. at first, you do the sensible thing and ignore it; but the longer he stares, the more you want to look over, until finally you can’t take it anymore.

“i’ll be back,” you mumble to the other guests, although you doubt they hear you with how rowdy everyone is being; the noise isn’t unwelcomed, the distraction serves to mask your footsteps when you scurry from the living room to the back corridor, turning corner after corner until you find the bathroom.

a coward — that’s what you are.

you barricade yourself in there without thinking, heart pounding loud enough to disorient you. after several long minutes, you splash water on your face and take a few deep breaths.

“i can’t believe i ran away,” your voice is so soft you barely hear the words — almost as if you’re still in disbelief over the entire situation. there’s something off about renji tonight; the tension between you was more palatable and tangible than normal.

even though you feigned nonchalance as best as you could, there were so many moments where you couldn’t help but watch him too. pitiful. absolutely pitiful. there’s no excuse for it, and yet you struggle to find one anyway.

as you look at your reflection in the mirror above the sink, you try to convince yourself to head back out there. sooner or later, people will realize that you’ve gone missing — and rangiku is nosy enough and like a bloodhound when she’s drunk. your time is incredibly limited now.

there’s no reason for you to continue to avoid the inevitable, so you sigh and give yourself a small pep talk before heading back outside.

TRUTH X OR X …

renji’s mood doesn’t improve at all; in fact, it worsens the moment ichigo sits right next to him. he’s not even sure why this sets him off, but even closing his eyes and counting backwards does nothing to keep him calm.

with slight difficulty, renji grits out, “what do you want?”

undeterred, ichigo stares at renji pointedly, voice steady as he says, “you could go after her, you know.”

again, renji sucks his teeth loudly, arms folded against his chest, right leg bouncing slightly as he taps his foot on the floor. punching ichigo would be pointless, and then rukia would get involved and he doesn’t have time to deal with the fallout from that so he keeps his hands to himself.

besides, his anger is obviously misdirected right now. he knows — he knows —but he doesn’t care, so he doesn’t mince his words when he responds with, “go after who?” through his peripheral, he can see ichigo’s patience has also reached its limit.

“you’re not that stupid, so stop acting like it.”

normally, renji would take the opportunity to mes s around and argue back and forth, but he might actually fight his friend if he doesn’t walk away. so, he does; abrupt and without looking back, footsteps heavy on the hardwood floor.

maybe he just needs to change his approach with you, maybe talking things out would work in his favor; or maybe he needs to fuck you hard enough to purge you from his mind.

he lies to himself when he considers the first option, because it’s the second option that drives him to walk a little faster, head full of impossible thoughts as he wonders just how far you’d let him go.

when renji finally finds you, you’re in the middle of rebuffing the advances of an unfamiliar guest — they’re drunk, handsy, and keep oscillating between giving you cheesy pick-up lines and berating you for rejecting them. but you stand firm, and your voice is relatively loud when you tell them, “for the last fucking time, go away.”

under normal circumstances, renji would let you handle this yourself; he has no desire to play prince charming or be a knight in shining armor. you’re more than capable, and he’s seen the way you fight and argue to defend yourself — but, it’s when they place a wandering hand on your hip that he loses sight of all of that.

a brief moment passes, where your blood boils as you contemplate how best to kick their ass, but you never get the chance. a rather large shadow hovers over you both, but you already know who it is without having to look properly.

renji is a force to be reckoned with on a good day, but he’s at his fucking limit right now.

he doesn’t ask, doesn’t give any options for retreat, doesn’t say a word when he yanks them off with a brute strength that surprises even you.

now, can he really be blamed for throwing them into the neighboring wall hard enough to make a noticeable hole? and is it really his fault that the drunk can hardly walk as they clutch their broken arm while murmuring something unintelligible, something that renji takes as a sign of them wanting a repeat demonstration?

consequences be damned, he gives the drunk a lethal look before they scramble away in fear.

“loser,” he says loud enough for them to hear, but they don’t double back or even try to go toe-to-toe with the hot-headed lieutenant. you watch, half-amused and half-impressed with the unnecessary machismo, but still, you know better than to chastise him right now, especially when your heart sputters out of control from his proximity.

“…thanks,” you say, a faint flush on your cheeks, voice soft, head fuzzy when you realize that renji — aka mr. “i’ll fight you on everything any day of the week unprovoked for no reason other than to drive you crazy” — saved you. unprompted at that.

you make the mistake of looking up at him, your nerves prompting you to take a small step back when you realize that the usual hostility that renji reserves for you specifically is nowhere to be found. in its place is something more unreadable — or, rather, you don’t want to read into it for fear of being wrong.

renji steps closer, which makes you back up again until your back hits the wall and you’re no longer able to escape.

“we need to talk,” he says suddenly, but you shake your head, non-verbally objecting to the idea, curls bouncing wildly with your exaggerated movements. since he knows he’s pressed for time, he grabs your face with his large hand and stops you from moving. “that wasn’t a request.”

swallowing rusty nails would be better than dealing with your conflicting feelings over renji right now, because he’s much too close to you and now you’re forgetting why it is you hate him in the first place. ironically, he’s in the exact same position. so far, he’s acted on impulse over you more times than he can count tonight, but he supposes that’s to be expected — you are a wildcard, after all.

“what if i don’t want to.” your response is clumsy, the words tumbling one after the other. “what if i want you to leave?” you don’t actually mean that, but you throw it at him anyway, to see if maybe this was all a fluke, and maybe, just maybe he’ll remember himself and you both can go back to fighting like usual.

he considers your question, goes so far as to release your face to wrap his hand around your throat instead. your sharp inhale and parted lips tell him all he needs to know.

with a slightly raised brow, he asks, “well, do you?”

because if you do, he’ll walk away right now. but he knows what your answer will be, he just has to drag it out of you. he squeezes your neck to remind you to hurry it up, and before you can answer him properly, he places his leg in between yours, pressing close enough that you roll your hips forward while whimpering softly.

he really didn’t think any of this through, but luckily the adrenaline from it all won’t wear off anytime soon, so he’ll improvise along the way. he spent most of the night dealing with a semi-hard cock that wouldn’t listen to reason no matter how many times he tried to stop thinking about you. but now? all of that restraint goes out of the window, and before he can question it, he kisses you.

you’ve kissed plenty of people in your life — some good, most were mediocre and uninspiring — but renji actually takes your breath away. everything about him commands all your attention; from the way his lips move against yours greedily, leaving behind burning kisses that make your nipples harden underneath your clothes — to the way he thrusts his tongue in between your plush lips, licking inside of your mouth hotly, igniting an inextinguishable flame deep inside of you.

he grabs your hip with his free hand, squeezing hard, fingers digging firmly. all the irritation from earlier dissipates completely, leaving you feeling lightheaded and needy; you grind against him recklessly, arousal dampening the front of your panties, clit sensitive as it rubs against the delicate fabric. his cock presses against you — thick, long, and hard — and you wonder if this is why he’s so angry with you all the time.

was it always that simple?

if you asked the question aloud, he wouldn’t know what to tell you — it’s a combination of things, but mostly he’s an idiot; he knows that now, but likewise you’re an idiot too. you just don’t realize it yet.

it’s renji who pulls away first, lightly panting, breath warm against your lips as he releases his hold on your neck. he doesn’t know where he finds the strength to string together a coherent statement, but his voice is low and husky when he speaks. “answer my question.”

you blink at him, completely in a daze, lips slightly swollen from all the kissing. “wh-what?” you don’t remember what he asked you, and you don’t care.

“do you want me to leave?”

for some reason, you completely forgot that you told him that. you rub your lips together and run your hands along his chest. “no.” the answer comes out automatically, without hesitation, and that’s all the encouragement he needs.

“good.”

SAY X IT X LOUDER

he picks you up with ease, almost as if you weigh nothing; a small squeal spills out of you as you wrap your legs around his waist, and renji gives you a sly smile — one laced with mischief and an unspoken promise of what’s to come.

you’re back in the bathroom again, this time sitting on the counter with renji standing in between your legs. his hands coast along your curvy hips and down your thighs. he’s touching you but he’s not touching you and it’s driving you crazy.

with hurried, eager hands you both undress, and for the umpteenth time you internally curse this style of uniform; still, it doesn’t take too long before his hands are on you again, calloused palms rough and warm against your skin. he places a kiss on your jaw, then another on your neck right underneath your earlobe; each kiss he leaves behind distorts your common sense, makes you feel irrational and impatient. your hands are soft and well-practiced, stroking his stiff cock as his hips jerk forward from your touch.

he can’t remember the last time someone had him this worked up, which pisses him off a little; because that means him fucking you once won’t settle things. at that thought, renji bites your neck and your startled yelp quickly morphs into a moan when he runs his tongue along the mark. he dips his hand in between your thighs, rubbing his thick fingers against your slit. a loud banging on the door has you looking over, and you can’t remember if he bothered to lock it once you both were inside.

your attention nearly falters, but when he pinches your clit you buck your hips, a shiver shooting down your spine at the slight pain.

“eyes on me,” is all he says, seemingly annoyed that you would dare to focus your attention elsewhere, “always keep them on me.” what he means by that, he doesn’t know, but you take the command at face value and nod while swallowing. he slides a finger inside of your wet pussy, and while you initially wanted to keep quiet to avoid suspicion and to prevent anyone from intruding, but you can’t now.

“renji,” you breathe, fingers trembling as you hold onto the counter for support, he thrusts his finger in and out, quick and hard, before inserting another. you clench around him, hips rocking forward as he fingerfucks you and grinds his palm against your clit. you close your eyes and moan louder than you mean to, chest heaving, thoughts jumbled and incoherent. he scissors his fingers inside of you, but quickly removes them without prompting.

“fuck!” you open your eyes again and stare at him in disbelief. “why did you stop?”

he laughs darkly and grabs your face roughly, fingers pressing into your soft skin without remorse. “what did i tell you earlier?” everything about this situation is laughable. he gave you very specific instructions, ones he thought were easy enough for you to follow. for some reason your movements are sluggish, mind in a haze as you scramble to remember but nothing comes to mind.

as you open and close your mouth, looking every bit as adorable as you are alluring, he decides to show you a bit of kindness.

“get down.” his command comes swift, his patience practically nonexistent; precum glides down the head of his thick cock, but he ignores it for the sake of teaching you a lesson. you don’t bother waiting for him to repeat himself and slide off the counter. “turn around.”

like a doll, your movements are dictated by renji with simple, short statements. nothing about that phases you, though; it’s all very exciting, so when you do turn to face the counter, you bend forward and lean over the counter. renji admires the roundness of your ass and slaps it hard.

again, you find yourself moaning loudly, without shame and not caring about the volume of your voice. surely the others won’t pay attention, as they’re still very drunk and are entertaining themselves with more games. another slap on your ass has you grabbing onto the counter again, legs shaking, arousal dripping between your thighs in anticipation. if renji doesn’t fuck you soon, you might actually die.

he knows he’s taking too damn long, but it’s much more interesting making you work for him. he rubs the tip of his cock against your puffy pussy, gliding it in between your slick folds, your moans sweetly wrapping around him once he pushes inside of you slowly. someone bangs on the door again, making you look over, anxiety quickly filling your head with unnecessary what ifs that almost command your full attention.

with narrowed eyes, renji grabs onto your hair, curls soft in his hand, and yanks hard.

“the fuck did i say earlier?”

goosebumps travel down your arms as a different kind of awareness and clarity surges through you quickly. you blink at your reflection, watching the way he towers over you, his muscles hard and defined — sculpted from years of training and dedication to honing his skills. it hits you then, what he’s really asking you.

“to,” you swallow thickly, throat dry, “to keep my eyes on you always.” you say it all in one breath, gasping when he runs his tongue along the curve of your ear. you don’t know how much more you can take, but you know if you complain, if you say anything he might stop altogether.

renji’s smile is wicked and dark, his lips graze your earlobe, voice deep and gravelly, a huskiness that wasn’t there before as he thrusts into you, burying his cock deeply.

“good girl.”

he refrains from kissing you properly, instead pushing you down so you can lean over the counter again. your mind melts from it all, and you’re panting, heart beating faster and faster as he firmly places a hand on your back.

“you’re squeezing me so tight,” he remarks thoughtfully, although you note the slight strain in his voice; as much as he tries to act like he’s not that affected by you, you know that isn’t the case at all. your pussy is every bit as enticing and heavenly as he knew it would be; he pulls back and slams his cock into you all over again, filling you completely. you try to keep watching him in the mirror, but he’s fucking you like he’s angry with himself for being so attracted to you.

and he absolutely is. it’s a truth he fought against for so long that he’s given up on denying it now. your moans drip onto his skin like caramel, sticky and sweet, and when you say his name like that — your voice going higher and higher from the ferocity of his thrusts — he nearly loses his mind.

“fuck,” he says out loud, grabbing your hip roughly, your wetness coating the length of his cock, “you’re taking me so well.” he knows you can’t really answer him, and he likes that; you’re beyond caring at this point, instead focusing on the way his cock reaches a spot that has you bouncing your ass and fucking yourself against him. normally, renji would play around and edge you in retaliation, but he’s too far gone, completely under the spell of your pretty pussy, with how soft and tight it is.

you’re not sure how you got here, but you’re drowning in ecstasy right now. he instructs you to lift your leg to rest it onto the counter, pulling out momentarily to help you position and spread your legs further apart. he plunges his cock into you again, keeping his hips closer as he gives you shorter, frenzied thrusts. your head spins and you can’t think straight, but that doesn’t matter. all you care about is the way renji is angling his hips, rolling them forward to pound into your cunt roughly, balls heavy as they smack against your ass.

“oh, oh, oh.” you swear your life flashes before your eyes, because something possesses him, his strokes shorter, brutal, and frenetic. drool slides down your chin, your voice hoarse from how loud you’ve been. you’re sure someone’s heard you by now, but you don’t care.

how can you?

with renji fucking you like this — merciless and possessive, fingers brusing your skin, almost as if he wants to make sure you’ll be as obsessed with him as he is with you — your common decency, your morals, everything that makes you you, they don’t exist.

all that’s left is this burning desire to let him have his way with you for as long as he wants. thankfully, you have enough sense to not admit that out loud; who knows what kind smugness you’ll be subjected to if renji knew.

but you’re pretty damn transparent about it, he can tell from the way you can’t stop clenching your pussy around his cock, from how your pussy makes loud, lewd squelching noises — ones that he’ll commit to memory so he can revisit them from time to time.

tears roll down your cheeks and you sob as you hold onto the counter as best as you can, back arching, hips rocking against him with a neediness you never knew you had. there’s a tightening in your stomach and your pulse skyrocketing as a flash of white practically blinds you. he watches the way your pussy keeps swallowing the length of his cock, and you finally fall over the edge, orgasm suffocating you with its intensity.

your cunt flutters around him, gummy walls soft and hypnotic, an addiction he never thought he’d have; breathing heavily, his muscles tense and renji groans something that suspiciously sounds like your name. the thought alone makes your face burn and warms your chest in a way that doesn’t make sense. and when he finally cums, he humps into you, cum thick and hot as it spills inside your pussy, mixing with your slick wetness. a completely messy affair, but he doesn’t care — it’s not his bathroom, after all.

legs trembling, you’re limp and incapable of movement, whimpering and whining until he finally pulls out of you.

renji runs a hand down his face, feeling spent but more than satisfied. suddenly his shoulders aren’t so tight and tense, and his mood is much more tolerable. you do your best to stand but almost fall — your legs are useless, turned to jelly because of the man behind you. he chuckles at that, then clears his throat once he realizes. he fully expected there to be a moment of awkwardness after, but it never comes. when he sees your face — lips bruised and swollen, face flushed, eyes glazed with a faraway look — he feels compelled to kiss you again. so, he does. it’s not sweet, nor is it tender, but it still makes your heart swell all the same. he holds you close as you wrap your arms around his neck, doing your best to keep standing, even though your legs are ready to give out.

you don’t know exactly what any of this means, but you do understand him a bit better now. he’s terrible with expressing himself, but you kind of like that about him; and maybe this isn’t the healthiest relationship, but life was uncertain and you’d take renji fucking you like it’s his last day alive over him openly hating you any day.

[she-who-fights-and-writes]

HOW TO WRITE A FINAL DRAFT

(From Someone Who’s Been Working on the Same Book for Over Ten Years)

Listen, I know what you might be thinking: “why the hell would I want advice on how to work on my final draft from someone who can’t even get her shit together for her own book?”

However, because I’ve had to re-draft my own novel so many times (Primarily due to poor outlining, lack of time and inspiration, and my own insecurities as a writer), I’ve learned a lot over the years on when to know if your book is done (or not!) and how to keep motivated. 

Just a disclaimer that these are my own tips and tricks that you may not agree with, and that everyone’s writing process is different! Don’t feel pressured to do things my way if you feel like it doesn’t work for you as a writer; everyone’s experience varies, and there are always exceptions!

1. Know If You’re Ready to Start a Final Draft

Some vocabulary for writers to know:

Content editing is a form of editing that revises the overall style, substance, and content of a story. Copyediting is a form of editing that revises grammatical, spelling, readability, continuity, and factual errors within a story.

A way I would know if I’m ready to make a final draft is if I am no longer doing major content editing on the book. This means I am no longer making major changes to the plot, characters, setting, and other facets of the book. There isn’t any re-writing of entire scenes, or major plot holes that require an overhauling of the entire book.

You know you’re ready for a Final Draft if your primary concerns are copyediting. 

Of course, with copyediting errors such as continuity, there will inevitably be some re-writing required, but I personally would not want to start a “final draft” at a stage where the book’s major plot points must be constantly changed during the editing process. 

This varies so much, from writer to writer; so my best advice is to start your final draft when you think you’re ready!

2. Consider Getting Some Beta Readers

Again, this is an incredibly complex process; some people like to have beta readers on their earlier drafts, while others like to have beta readers for their later drafts.

A beta reader is someone who reads a work of fiction before it is published in order to mark errors and suggest improvements, typically without receiving payment (although it’s nice to swap stories and beta read for each other!) You can find people willing to be beta readers all over, especially on tumblr!

Having a round of beta readers is a great opportunity to have unbiased eyes on your work, and to have people pointing out plot holes and inconsistencies that maybe you hadn’t noticed! It also gives you a much-needed break from writing your story, and helps you come back to it with fresh eyes once everyone is done.

I personally am waiting to finish my current rewrite before having a round of beta readers, and after they look it over, doing a draft of my own editing before moving on to a final draft.

(Things don’t work out the way you think they will, though—that’s life! Take as long or as little time as you need!)

3. Consider Taking a Break

In my opinion, the best way to start editing a final draft is doing so with fresh eyes. After finishing your second-to-last draft, shelf your project for a few weeks (or maybe a few months!) and move on to another work. Then, you can come back to your story as if you were a new reader, and catch mistakes that you may have missed if you were still in the groove of writing!

This can sometimes be dangerous for writers who struggle with inspiration and getting back into things, though, so do whatever works best for you!

4. Tips to Keep Inspired

How to Overcome Writer’s Block

How to Write Consistently

Writer’s block and lack of inspiration will be your greatest enemies on your final draft! Oftentimes, people lose steam once they see the finish line is ahead. Check out the tips in the above post to help keep you on task!

5. Learn How to Stop Editing: It Will NEVER be Perfect

You are your own worst critic. You will always find something to tweak every single time you comb through your own writing; hell, even published authors sometimes read their own books and think of ways they could’ve improved certain sentences or scenes! Understand that “Final Draft” does not mean “Devoid of Flaws.”

Sometimes, the best thing you can do for your book is to know when you need to stop overworking it and send it out to the world. Writers who struggle with liking their writing can find this especially difficult, which is why it can be helpful to have beta readers or a writing buddy who can put their foot down and say: it’s done! You’re ready!

Hope this helped, and happy writing! I believe in you!

[moments-on-film]

I really enjoy watching and analyzing The Bear. On my rewatches, I have noticed and written about numerous themes, connections, lines, acting choices and plot points that weave and connect together in beautiful ways. Rewatching and analyzing often exposes other things as well. Some are a little odd to me, to the point where I made the list below:

Season 1

The Timeline. I’m not going to fully get into this, but the timeline on this show is confusing. I think it’s because they shot the pilot episode in the summer and the rest of S1 and all of S2 in the winter/early spring. I’ll just leave it at that, but for example, how we get from a few months after Michael’s death (February) to his birthday, (in November) over the span of the first 3 episodes doesn’t gel with the dialogue. The prop of the card that shows Michael’s birthday and day he passed is what I am basing the dates on. Was this a props error? The pilot is so clearly summer in Chicago and in the rest of the episodes in S1 it is clearly freezing.

Cigarettes. Throughout S1 snd S2, the cigarettes Carmy smokes vacillate between light cigarettes with white filters, and regular ones with dark beige filters. No one just switches between lights and regulars who seriously smokes, as Carmy does, making it feel like a props mistake.

Chain. Carmen is wearing a complexly different chain necklace in the pilot episode vs the rest of S1 and S2.

Hand washing/double spoon use. The scene where Carmy “washes” his hands at the end of 1x2 is bizarre. He puts soap on them and then dries them off immediately with paper towels without using water again or looking down. It’s the only time we ever see him wash his hands so it really sticks out as abnormal and totally out of character. He’s a smoker and coming from fine dining and there has been/still is a pandemic. He would have washed his hands throughly here to show how much attention to detail his character puts into his work. Michael, by contrast, is seen washing his hands fully in 1x6. Was this an editing error? It might have been. It really took me out of the scene the first time I saw it. After he does this, he uses a spoon to taste something, puts it into his mouth, and then uses that same spoon to move chicken in a pan. I think this was an editing mistake, like maybe they cut out the part where he uses a new spoon, but as is, it makes it look like Carmy doesn’t care about cleanliness, which, after watching him obsessively scrub the kitchen on his hands and knees earlier in the episode, makes no sense.

Possible contamination. Carmy touches his face while making hotdogs in 1x4. Uncle Jimmy is telling a story and he’s laughing and it’s clearly very cold outside, but he wipes at his nose and face and then shakes his hands off over the food he’s prepping. This was one of the very, very few moments to me that felt out of character. Carmy would have reflexes to not contaminate food from his years of service, especially the years under microscope scrutiny from the chef in New York.

Camera is visible. You can see the camera person in 1x8 in the reflection of the glass door when Carmy goes to open the door and get the order from the delivery guy.

Carmy’s fingernails. Throughout S1, and in S2, Carmy’s fingernails are trimmed, buffed, neat and clean. I looked for this in every scene, as it helps us understand his character and how seriously he takes his himself and his craft. It also provides a sharp contrast to Richie (in S1), whose nails are visibly dirty, causing us to distrust him and not take him seriously as someone who should be handling food. However, in arguably the most important moment of S1, when Carmy texts Sydney, and then opens the envelope from Mikey, his thumbnail on his left hand is too long and looks unclean. Actor’s nails fall under the jurisdiction of the makeup department so I’m confused why they didn’t realize there was going to be a major closeup on his hands in this scene and fix them if they were not camera ready. It’s the only time in S1 or S2 his nail looks off and it’s an extreme closeup. I noticed it the first time I watched this scene and it really took me out of the moment. I cringe every time I see that nail. In the next scene when he’s making the spaghetti, this nail is neat and clean again, so to me, the prior scene was a mistake.

Season 2

Lockers. Carmy has switched his locker to the other side of the wall. In S1, his is on the left. In S2, it’s on the right. Usually your locker is YOUR locker. This was odd, but it set up the Sydney/Carmy scene well and maybe Carmy moved to be closer to Mikey’s locker.

Tattoos. You can see the actor Jeremy Allen White’s personal E.Z. tattoo on his arm when he’s in his apartment before he sits in the chair in 2x1. There’s no makeup on it at all. It’s completely visible. This tattoo is not Carmy’s, it’s the actor’s, and I think he has said before that it’s his mother’s initials. This tattoo has always been covered with makeup. I don’t understand how this oversight from the makeup department made the final cut.

Different vs differently. In 1x5, Sydney tells Carmy about her catering company, Sheridan Road. “Not a night goes by that I don’t think about what I could have done different.” In 2x3, Natalie tells Carmy, “I don’t want to be treated any different.” In both instances the word differently should have been used. It’s not proper English otherwise. The characters don’t need to speak perfect English, that’s not the point, but these episodes were written by the same person, so that might be why both characters use the same word.

Area codes. I am so baffled by this, I’m still thinking about it. In the beginning of 2x6, there’s a sign on the wall in Donna’s house with everyone’s name and phone number written on it. On this prop, the name Michael is actually spelled wrong, as “Micheal”. Carmen and Michael’s area codes are both listed as (913). Carmen’s area code is well established as 773, which he literally has tattooed on his arm, and it’s in the script, as he verbally says his phone number to the fridge guy and then Claire in 2x2. Michael’s area code was (847), per the script, via Richie to Uncle Jimmy in 1x4. The (913) area code is for Kansas. I don’t understand why the area codes would be for Kansas and not the ones that we already established were theirs, for Chicago, and the suburbs of Chicago, 5 years before present day in the timeline of The Bear.

Eleven Madison PARK. Richie insults Carmy in 1x1, calling him “Eleven Madison Park dic@&ead.” In the coda to this line in 2x8, Carmy calls Richie “Eleven Madison dic@&ead.” Park should have been part of that line for it to fully connect, as it’s the name of the NYC restaurant where Carmy worked, and he’s saying the line, so it should have been the same here for consistency.

The card from Michael to Carmen “I love you dude. Let it rip” is written differently in S1 and S2. The handwriting doesn’t match. It looks like a different prop.

Left handed staff/actors. In 2x9, Carmy freaks out about the pan station. “These should be on the right side because we are all right handed.” This line of dialogue is not true of the actors on this show. If you watch closely in season 1 and 2, BOTH actors portraying Tina and Ebrahim are actually left handed. The actor playing Manny is left handed, and the actor playing Richie favors his left hand as well. This line should have been cross checked with the various Actor’s actual physicality because it doesn’t really make sense.

Food runners. Why are the food runners not running food in 2x10? They stand in the background most of the time and don’t move, even when Carmy and Sydney are yelling for hands. No one moves when Carmy says he needs hands please for PX table 31, Claire’s table, but three food runners are standing directly behind him and completely ignore him. It’s their first night on the job and Carmy is the Executive Chef and owner. They should have helped run food or not been in the shot because it’s confusing.

I really enjoy analyzing this show, and see and greatly appreciate all of the creativity, energy, effort, talent and passion that has clearly been poured into it by the entire creative team. This post is not meant to do anything other than point out the few moments I noticed that made me pause and say, wait, what?

Are there any others that you noticed?